Jump (Dear Evan Hansen)

The Park

"You see, I like you, but I also like Zoe."

"So you're bi."

"Well; the thing is-"

"Your bi, Evan. There's nothing wrong with it. You need to relax a bit. So what, you like boys and girls. That's just who you are," Connor says as he shrugs casually. A small breeze moves the tree branches above us as we sit in the grass, leaning against a large trunk. I lean into Connor's shoulder and play with a blade of grass. "Start with my sister and then go to me if that doesn't work out," he says jokingly.

"Well, aren't your parents mad?"

"Mad?" He says, and begins to laugh. "How can they be mad if they don't know?" I shoot up from his shoulder and stare at him, the blade of grass fluttering to the ground.

"Connor," I say, tense, "they don't know?!"

"That is correct. Don't tell me you went home after that meeting and said, 'hey mom, I was in the janitors closet with Connor and we expressed our feeling towards each other'."

"Well," I say, my voice relaxing as I lean back into Connor, "I have more of an excuse. My mom works-"

"Oh please Evan. Just admit that we both aren't ready to come out yet. And that's okay, okay?" I nod and pluck another piece of grass from the ground. The only sounds that fill the air are the light breeze and the bright green tree leaves rustling together. I nuzzle further into Connor's shoulder and enjoy his presence.

"Connor, I-"

He takes his hands and gently grabs my face. Our lips lock, and everything blurs. I shut my eyes and savor the feeling of his lips connecting with mine. Shock doesn't cross my mind; just Connor's soft lips. I let him lead the way, since this is a first for me. His gentle hands slide onto my shoulders and pull me closer. It feels like the feeling lasts forever, and I'd be fine with that. All I need is Connor, right here, right now; and that's enough. Our lips finally part but our eyes lock. I can his lips release short breaths of air. "I love you," I barely whisper. The words slide from my lips smoothly; a feeling that is rare for me. Connor just nods, unable to speak. But I understand exactly what he is saying. We stand up, and our hands lock. His grip is strong, but gentle. It makes me feel safe; it makes me feel like I belong. Slowly, we walk through the grassy park. "Thank you."

"What?" Connor asks, stopping to give me direct eye contact.

"You... you were right."

"About what? Waiting?"

"No. That I would be found. You were right. You found me. That's all I need."

"Evan Hansen," he says, beaming, "you're making me fall for you harder," he says. I blush, and he squeezes my hand. I turn my foot so my body is in front of him, and cautiously grab his other hand. He accepts, and brings his face close to mine. Our noses touch, and he nuzzles his against mine.

"Do you love each other?" A voice says. We flinch, and follow the voice. A young girl of 4 or 5 stands at our feet. I nod.

"Yes, yes we do."

"You make a good couple," she says, beaming, and runs back to play with her friends. I smile at Connor, and he grins back at me, his smiling spreading from ear to ear.

"You know, we do make a pretty good couple, Hansen."

"Wait, so are we like dating now, or-"

"Let's just call this our first date, okay?" I nod and he puts his arm around me. We walk through the park, the grass bouncing beneath our feet. I see the little girl look at us, I wave. She waves back at me. Suddenly, Connor taps me on the shoulder and then runs to the swings, giggling like a child. I laugh and start sprinting towards the swings. I dive stomach first onto one of the swings and fly forward.

"Man, Evan! I never knew you were that fast," Connor says laughingly.

"I have skills," I say, and we laugh together. I get up and sit normally on the swing. Connor grabs my hand, and we swing together, refusing to let go of each other. I loose track of time as people come and go, and the sun begins to set. "Connor," I say nervously, "it's getting late. How are you going to sneak back in?"

"My parents won't care. I've perfected my expertise over the years. I'm a pro at this stuff." We get up, still holding onto each other, and Connor starts walking. I stay still, causing him to turn.

"Connor Murphy, I don't want this day to end."

"Neither do I," he says as he wraps me into a hug.

And everything's okay.