Jump (Dear Evan Hansen)

One Day More

The door opens, again, as I swivel in a chair behind the front desk, occasionally fidgeting with my hands or untying and retying my shoes. I've gotten to the point where I ignore the door and just look down to avoid eye contact, but a familiar voice makes me look up. I glance at the clock; they arrived to the minute. Impressive. A woman walks up to the front desk, leaving the man to watch the two teenagers.

"Hi," the voice says to the receptionist before pausing and glancing at me. "Evan?" I give a gentle wave and sit up more, making sure to wink to the boy sitting in the waiting room before speaking.

"Hello, Mrs. Murphy," I say quietly.

"If you don't mind me asking, why are you here."

"Oh," I say, becoming more awkward by the second, "well you see I wasn't feeling well but I'm not like sick so you don't have to worry about that but like the other way not well and," I talk rapidly as I wave my arms a bit.

"I think I understand. Um, thank you," she says questionably. I give an awkward nod in return and hope that Connor noticed when I winked at him. I wish I had that special skill to just be comforting. Not awkward, or annoying, or stressful. Just comforting. When I exit my thoughts, I notice Mrs. Murphy has already checked in and is sitting down again. Part of me wants to wave to my sis- Zoe, but I decide not too. Instead, I text Connor.

E: Look at the reception desk.

Read at 10:00

I straighten my back against the chair and look across the room. Connor looks up from his phone, and I can see him exhale like the weight of the world has been lifted off of his shoulders. I grin widely at him, which makes him giggle. I must look like such a dork. My smiles are nothing compared to his though. Especially that little smirk that he'll sometimes give me that is so ador-

"How are you feeling Evan?" A voice asks as hands touch my shoulders, causing me to jerk away and stand up. My mom is standing on the other side of the chair I was just in. I glance back at Connor and my face turns red, realizing I'm not that good at lying. I start stuttering out some random syllables and grip the back of the swivel chair. Nervously, I gnaw on my lip. How am I going to lie that I am not feeling well and oh my gosh Connor is going to hate me for betraying him and-

"Why don't you come sit in with me? You don't look too well," mom says sympathetically. Wow. Well, that worked. I guess. I nod rapidly and follow behind her as she walks towards the Murphy family and requests for Connor to join. Mr and Mrs. Murphy bicker for a minute about whether or not somebody should go back with him, Mrs. Murphy taking the side of 'give him a chance Larry' and Mr. Murphy taking the side of 'we are just wasting their time Cynthia'. Connor stand is, 'I'm fine leave me alone and let me go back there' which shuts both of them up once and for all. Connor stands up and shuffles behind me, grabbing my hand once we become out of sight of his parents. "Connor," my mom says, causing us to release hands, "Evan is going to be joining us, is that okay?"

"YES," he says a little too convincingly. "I mean... that is uh... perfectly fine Mrs. Hansen." I nudge him in the side and he tries to hold back a smirk as we enter the room. He sits down and I awkwardly stand until mom gestures to a chair, which I quickly sit in. I start giving funny looks at Connor to lighten the mood, causing my mom to look at him weirdly as he starts to bust up laughing. But, she continues doing whatever a nurse does, measure his height and so on.

"Okay, Evan if you want to come with me-"

"No that's okay! I uh... you have work to do..."

"Um... Connor?"

"Fine with me, Mrs. Hansen."

"Alrighty then... Evan if you need me come ask at the front desk," she says, and exits. Connor hops down from the bed like thing and I stand up from my chair. He wraps his arms around me.

"Thank you," he whispers.

"Oh it's no problem at all Connor. So uh, I should probably go while you get into the robe thingy."

"What? You don't want to see my rock hard abs Hansen?" I laugh at his comment.

"What a strong, kind boyfriend I have," I say laughingly. "I'll just stand in the corner," I say and scoot over. I put my head into the wall. "Connor," I mumble, "should we make a plan for tomorrow?"

"We'll just wing it... we have it in the bag. Stop worrying so much. Oh, you can turn around now by the way." I nod and follow his request.

"What an elegant gown you're wearing, what brand is that?" I ask in a swishy voice, only causing Connor to laugh.

~

"Alright Connor, you're parents requested the influenza vaccination," my mom says as she renters the room. I stare at Connor, whose face goes pale. And that would be why Connor needed me today. I hop up and speed walk to Connor, who looks like he's come down with the flu himself. Willingly, I hop up on the bed next to him and wrap my arm around him.

"Evan-"

"I know what I'm doing," I whisper shout, interrupting my mom. I take my other arm and wrap it around his front side. I can feel him shake in my arms, his heart racing. He leans into my shoulder. Is this how Zoe felt? No, it couldn't be that way. Anyways, I love the person I'm holding. She didn't love me. She doesn't love me. Connor Murphy loves me, and I'm the luckiest person in the world. Connor Murphy chose me out of everyone else. And now it feels like it's just the two of us here, exploring this crazy thing called life. But I love it.

"Connor? Evan? It's over. You can um... let go now." But I hold onto him an extra second, refusing to let go and just savor his warm body in my arms.

And so does he.