BEFORE YOU LEAVE

Chapter 16

Taylor opens the door of her room after walking around for the past ten minutes. It was past eleven and she didn't want to face her best friend after her talk with Karlie. She was so confused about her feelings that she didn't know what to do with them. Why did she feel guilty? Why, when Karlie was in front of her with her lips pursed into a frown, did she want to kiss her and make her smile? These where the few questions that were invading her memory.

She walks in the room, and quietly changes into her pajamas. The bedroom was dark, peaceful and quiet, but something was off.

Taylor sits down on her bed and puts her glasses off, putting them on her nightstand. She looks over at her friend's side, and Ariana is sleeping peacefully on her side, a little smile dancing on her lips. The blond stares at the sleeping face for who knows how long until she's looking right into the shorter girl's brown eyes.

"Why are you still awake?" Ariana asks her, voice groggy from sleep. Taylor averts her stare with a sigh, surprised to find her friend awake at this hour.

"Couldn't sleep," she replies in a whisper. She hears the girl shifting, and out of the corner of her eye she sees her sitting on the bed with her legs crossed.

"Why? Do you want to talk about it?" Ariana questions, worry lacing her voice which was becoming clearer by the second. The blond shifts uncomfortably under the shorter girl's intrusive gaze. Does she really want to talk about Karlie now? With Ariana?

"I don't know if I want to talk about it," she says quietly, playing with her hands on her lap. Ariana turns on the lamp by her nightstand, and watches as Taylor quickly looks away from her in discomfort.

"You know I'm your friend. I'm here for you. I want to be there for you," Ariana whispers, grabbing ahold of the blond's hand. She squeezes it lightly before adding, "Is it Karlie? Did you talk with her?"

"Yeah," Taylor replies. Her voice was quivering and the worst part about it was she didn't know why she was becoming so emotional all of a sudden. "We met today at the library for that stupid project about love. I told her that...that I'm sorry. I told her that I still want her in my life and that I want to be friends with her,"

"Do you? Want to be just friends with her?" the shorter girl asks, tilting her head to the side to try to look directly in her friend's ocean blue eyes but failing. "I mean, whenever we talk about her you become upset or emotional or–"

"I'm not upset or emotional," Taylor interruptes her quickly. She wriggles out of Ariana's grasp and folds both of her arms on her lap. "I told you, I don't care about her,"

"Then why do you want to be friends with her?" Ariana asks. Taylor looks at her for a moment, trying to figure out what she's thinking but her face is neutral.

"I don't know, Ariana. I'm confused, I don't know why I'm feeling all of this," Taylor replies frustrated. She grabs her hair by the roots with both of her hands and sighs. "I don't want to lose her but I don't why...I'm just really confused right now."

"Maybe you have feelings for her. Have you ever considered that maybe you have feelings for her and that you actually care about her?" Ariana asks. Taylor seems surprised by the option the shorter girl just laid out and she looks away.

"I..." she trails off, not knowing what to say. "Ariana, please, let's sleep. I don't know what I want right now and I don't want to talk about my feelings right now," she adds, shaking her head.

"You said you couldn't sleep," Ariana shrugs, beginning to lay down on her side.

"Ariana," Taylor warns her. "Please. It's complicated,"