Paging Payton(A Grey Anatomy/Jackson Avery Fanfic)

T H I R T Y- F O U R

Jackson Avery

"Please, please just let me die." Payton pleaded with me. Tears slid down her face and her whole body shook violently.

"We just have to get you to the OR. You'll be fine, I promise." I held Payton's hand in mine as we rushed her down the hallway on a gurney. She had regained consciousness almost immediately after passing out, screaming in pain as she came to. We had to wait for the firefighters to make sure the OR floor was structurally stable enough before we could take Payton in. In the moments we were waiting, Payton had been begging me to end her life.

"Just a little longer, hold on for me just a little longer. Please." I pushed her hair back from her forehead with the free hand that wasn't holding hers. Her eyes drifted shut and her yelling ceased for a moment.

"Payton! Payton," I started panicking. "Wake up! No-" my voice broke and I nearly collapsed as we came to a stop at the OR doors. I could feel hot tears drip down my face as I whispered Payton's name.

"We're gonna take good care of her, Jackson." Richard put his hand on my back, trying to reassure me. He gave me a pitied look and it only added to my confusion. It felt like I was being tossed around in a sea of blackness. I was confused, scared. I couldn't seem to catch my breath, either.

"No, I-I'm going in. I have to-" another wave of confusion crossed over me. "I have to help her, make sure she's ok-"

"We'll update you as soon as we know anything for sure. We've got her Jackson, we've got her."

--

"You ready to go home?" I heard a voice say from above me. I'd been sitting in a crappy plastic waiting room chair for hours, waiting for an update on Payton. April had been overseeing the evacuation protocols as Hunt was in the OR with Payton. I'd tallied Hunt, Weber, Bailey, Pierce, and Riggs all go in so far. Now, as I lifted my head from my hands, I saw April standing in front of me asking me if I was ready to leave.

"Go home? Why the hell would I go home?" I asked.

"You've had a long day, I'm sure Payton is fine. You guys aren't even friends, you should t have to stay. Besides all you're doing is just sitting here." April acted like the fact that one of our own could die at any moment was about a big a deal as the cafeteria running out of jello.

"She could die-" I started to raise my voice at April.

"Jackson, there's no need to yell at me." April held her hands up in defense. "Come on let's just go. Aren't you ready to get home? It'd be better than just sitting here."

"You think I want to just sit here?" I scoffed. "Payton is on that OR table right now and I'm sitting in this stupid, shitty plastic chair waiting to see if she pulls through. I have to sit back and wait to see if somebody I love dies. I should be in that OR helping her, but instead I'm sitting out here doing nothing so no, I am not ready to go." I snapped at April. I saw her face go slack and the next words that came out of her mouth were cold and quiet.

"You love her?"

"Of course I do, April." I waved her off. "We're- we were best friends. We've been through too much for me to not love her. What's that matter anyways?"

"Because were dating, Jackson!" April yelled at me. "Why are you dating me if you supposedly love Payton?"

"April, you know I don't mean it like that-" I raised my voice once more.

"Almost three months, Jackson. Three months of my life I've given to you, to us, and now you're telling me you were in love with Payton this whole time?! Who was there for you when you were recovering from your car accident? That's right, me! Not her!-"