Friends.

Chapter 38

Harry's Pov

Another day of rehearsals means that right now, at 8 in the morning when I want to be in bed, I'm sitting in the back of a car being driven by some twat into some studio, with my body guard in the passenger seat and a hundred screaming girls surrounding the studio. 

The driver's probably not a twat, I shouldn't think like that. I never used to. Everyone's a twat these days. I huff out a deep frustrated sigh as I practically push my lips into a smile, wind down the window and wave to the girls as we go past them. 

It's bad enough I have to spend all day stuck in this building, singing and getting talked at repeatedly by people who think they're organised but who knows. Everything will all come together for the first show, but everyones so stressed at the moment, it's not a good atmosphere to be in. 

I run my fingers through my hair, sticking it up and pulling at the ends. It's longer than it should be but who cares, who am I trying to impress? The one person I want doesn't care about my appearance...she doesn't care about money, fame, any of it, she only cared about my personality and then I became someone she didn't like. She doesn't care about me or anything to do with me anymore. 

Don't cry in front of people. I clench my fists in an attempt to release the growing emotions inside of me and take a deep breath as I walk into the main area where no one is yet but normally where we do vocal warm ups. I'm not in the mood to be here after the weekend I had. I wish I had someone to talk to, Niall's out because he's friends with her...Louis is out because they had a thing for a while before I sabotaged it, Liam...I could talk to Liam I guess, or Zayn, but they don't really know Lola, they won't understand. Maybe if Lou comes in today l can pick her brain about it all. 

I sit down on a nearby chair and wait for the other boys to arrive. I hear Louis and Niall's voices fill the space and I look up to see them walking in, I can just make out what they're saying. 

"So, Lola told me everything. I'm super happy for ya!" Niall says, his voice loud and boisterous as always. My ears pricked up from the second I heard her name, my heart skipped too many beats and I almost lost my breath. 

"She did?" Louis scrunches up his face, he doesn't look too impressed...what are they on about?

"Yeah! About how you're together now, and how she's moving to New York." Niall says. 

My heart just stopped and I am now very physically gasping for air. What? 

There's too much of that sentence to process, my mind is in shutdown mode. Lola and Louis are together. I gulp down the large bubble forming in my throat. And Lola's moving to New York...she's moving away, far away from me. It's like a horrible dream where you just keep chasing something but you never quite get there and you wake up feeling angry and frustrated. My whole life is going to be angry and frustrated. She's slipping through my fingers...she's with him, and soon she's going to be in a completely different country. 

My heart has started beating again but its a rapid, distressed beat that sends panic through my body. 

"What?!" I stand up suddenly, interrupting their conversation with my loud voice, I didn't mean to be so loud, I have no control over my body right now because it's mentally shutting down. She's taken. She convinced me to let her go and now she's gone, she's really gone. It's only been...two or three days since I saw her last and her whole world has changed. 

You deserve it, you fucked her over why would someone like her love you, my subconscious snarls at me and I shake my head to get rid of those hurtful thoughts. 

Louis' body noticeably tenses at my intrusion to their conversation, Niall looks at me in a way so judgemental that I just know he knows everything. He probably thinks I'm a horrible person. Hell, I think I'm a horrible person.