Only Hope

Chapter 27

~Ryan's POV~

Every time I woke up in that hospital bed I forgot where I was. Then it came flooding back to me, making me want to die again and again. All I felt was pain. I looked over to see Cameron sleeping in the chair next to me. His position looked rather uncomfortable. I heard someone open the door and it startled me.

"Hi I am Neal Barbon, I am the councilor here. I just wanted to let you know that if you ever needed to talk about what is going on I am here for you. I won't share anything with anybody and that is a promise." This guy seemed like a robot, he had no emotion to him.

"Thank you, I will think about it." I lied straight through my teeth. I wouldn't go talk to him, I would go to talk to Cameron or Kate.

"I almost forgot about our meetings here every Monday at 7:30. This is where you can let out your feelings in a group where others around you have gone through similar situations and have done self harm." This conversation was making me anxious. I didn't like this guy or the way he was making me feel. I started to scratch around the area where I cut. I started to feel my self scratch off my skin but I continue to do it anyway. "What is wrong with your arm?" He pointed towards it. For being a phycologist he wasn't very good at reading peoples' feelings.

"Oh I just had a really bad itch and I guess I was so distracted by you I didn't notice what I was doing." He went to go grab and nurse and she came back and bandaged up my wounds.

~Cameron's POV~

I still worry about her all the time. I feel like I am the reason that she cut herself again. I should have been there for her. I should have checked my phone earlier. I should have gone to lunch with her instead of staying back with Nash and Matt. I blame myself. I will be there for her from now on and I won't let her out of my site ever again.

"Cameron?" Ryan said it and pulled me out of my train of thought.

"Huh? What?" I looked up to see her putting her hand out for me to grab.

"It wasn't your fault. Stop blaming yourself." Her eyes where looking into mine.

"I feel like it is... If I just..." She cut me off.

"If, if, if. It's not your fault. Things happen and thats it. There is no if, then, or buts in this situation. I hurt myself and that is it." I started to tear up but I told myself to man up and not cry.

"I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I found you dead. I could never fall in love with another girl. I would never want to marry or have children with another girl. I want it to be you." I just let it go with all the tears and everything. "I love you Ryan Mitchelle."

"I love you too Cameron Dallas."She started to cry and I leaned in for a kiss.

A/N: Heres another chapter sorry its kinda lame but its tieing up loose ends. But I don't know how much I will be able to update for the rest of the week. I have a track meet tomorrow and the next day then I have a volleyball tournament this weekend. But I will do my best. Thanks for all the reads and hope you like the book please vote comment and share.

xoxo Caitlin