Head Hunters

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"I'm afraid your services won't be required here, sir."

(y/n), Dipper, and Mabel were watching their favorite TV show, Ducktective.

Mabel and Dipper were sitting on the floor while (y/n) was hanging off the couch upside down.

Mabel was knitting a sweater while she was watching, and there was a bowl of popcorn was between the three of them.

During the climax of the Ducktective episode, Mabel reached towards it for some more and Dipper slapped her hand away.

"My men have examined this case and this is obviously an accident" the police officer on the tv said to the duck wearing a detective hat, gesturing towards a dead body in a telephone booth.

The duck got a closer look of the body. He quacked,

"An accident, constable, or is it...murder?!"

"What?!" the police officer exclaimed.

'Ducktective will return after these messages' said the TV.

Mabel dropped her knitting needles.

"That duck is a genius!" she said in admiration.

"Eh, it's easier to find clues when you're closer to the ground" Dipper said casually while (y/n) shoved some more popcorn into her mouth.

"Are you saying that you could outwit ducktective?" Mabel asked in disbelief.

"Any idiot can outwit ducktective" (y/n) said with her mouth full of popcorn. She forced herself to swallow. "Please, a body in a telephone booth with its arm still reaching up in agony? How is that not murder?"

Dipper nodded in agreement.

"Besides, I have very keen powers of observation." he said "For example, just by smelling your breath I can tell that you have been eating..."

he sniffed.

"...an entire tube of toothpaste?" He asked questionably, looking suspiciously at his sister.

"It was so sparkly!" said Mabel guiltily.

"So that's where all the toothpaste has been disappearing!" (y/n) exclaimed. "I was wondering why we were running out of that stuff so quickly."

"Hey, dudes!" said Soos, appearing suddenly at the door to the tv room. "You'll never guess what I found!" "Buried treasure!" Dipper exclaimed excitedly.

"Buried..." both (y/n) and Mabel said at the same time.

"Hey, I was gonna say that!" they both said at the same time, chuckling and giving their brother a light shove.

"So I was cleaning up when I found this secret door behind the wallpaper. It's crazy bonkers creepy!" He paused for dramatic effect.

"What's in it?" (y/n) asked eagerly. "Open it!"

Soos swung the door open to reveal an entire room full of what looked like...wax statues?

"Whoa!" Dipper said, looking around with a flashlight.

"It's a secret wax museum!"

"Does anybody else get the creepy feeling that we're being constantly watched?" asked (y/n) uneasily as she looked around at the creepy wax figures.

"It must be because these wax statues look so life-like!" said Mabel.

"Except for that one" Dipper said, shining his flashlight on a wax figure that was an exact replica of Grunkle Stan.

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