A Series Of Letters {Adopted by Palaye Royale}

Chapter Sixteen

***trigger warning***

"No," I mutter, pushing Emerson away. I feel his hand on my shoulder and shove him backward again. "No, Emmy." I continue to stare at the wall, eventually pulling the comforter over my head and crawling underneath it. Emerson just follows me and pulls me into his chest. After fighting him for a solid minute, I give in. My shoulders cave in against his, and I break down sobbing. Emerson pulls me close, hushing me as he rubs my back.

"I know you hate us right now...." He sighs, and it breaks my heart to hear him say that. "But I promise I'm not gonna leave you for a single second today....they'll have to kill me first." I try to smile, but only the side of my lips pull up. 

"I'm just...s-scared,"

"I know, sweetpea. Don't worry, I'm gonna be right here."

It's alot of crying. Syllables of words and fragments of sentences travel between the two of us. Each time he speaks his warm breath hits my face, and vice versa. His arms rest around my back, occasionally rubbing or pulling me closer. "You didn't eat yet today..." Emerson speaks softly. I shrug.

"Not hungry," I'm too stressed out to think about anything but this appointment right now. Emerson huffs angrily before latching his arms around my waist tightly. He picks me up, carrying me down the stairs to the kitchen. Emerson eventually sets me down between Remington's legs. He acts quick, trapping me before his torso and the island breakfast bar before I can blink. I whine high in my throat. Remington grabs both my wrists in his hand and doesn't allow me to run.

"Okay, look..." He says, turning me around. "I know you're upset..."

"You could say that..." I mutter under my breath. Remmi's eyes widen in shock before returning. 

"You gotta do this. We don't have..." I cut him off, anger starting to boil in my chest. I can practically smell the fight forming.

"I should have a choice!" I nearly yell. "It's my body! I don't have to go if I don't want to!" Remington's arm juts out to stop me too quickly.

"Lottie, you know we love you－" I stop Emerson mid-sentence. 

"No, you don't!" I start screaming now. I'm seeing red, I can't breathe I'm so angry. Remington still has me trapped between him and the piece of counter-top. "If you guys 'loved me', you wouldn't make me do this!" Emerson drops a cereal bowl to the ground, his breath catching in his throat. Sebastian, famous for eavesdropping, rushes into the room. "If you fucking cared at all you would understand that this is something that gives me anxiety and freaks me out. You'd understand that it's actually dangerous for my own well-being to do this! You don't give a shit!" Remington's hold on my wrists tightens, and I let out a squeak against my own will. I'm so angry I could break something. They don't understand. And if they truly did care, they'd let me make my own decisions and not make me do this.

Sebastian lifts me onto the breakfast bar, his hands pinning my own to it and leaving me immobile. "Lottie, sweetie;" He starts. I raise an eyebrow at him, my heart racing a mile a minute. "We do love you. You gotta understand that. If we didn't love you, we wouldn't make you do this－"

"You don't get it, Seb!" I huff. "None of you do! This is one of the scariest things for me. It brings on so much anxiety and stress it's not even funny."

"That's where you gotta understand. If anyone tries to fight any of us on being in that room with you, we won't stand for it. Stephanie's gonna be there, too, and you are the only person who has the power to kick any of us out. We love you, we aren't gonna purposely put you in danger."