A Series Of Letters {Adopted by Palaye Royale}

Chapter Twenty-Eight

I had so much fun yesterday, I recognize as I place a Zofran pill on my tongue. I don't remember falling asleep last night, but I fell asleep between Sebastian and Stephanie at some point during Aladdin. I woke up exactly where I passed out, Stephanie's leg between mine and Seb's arms holding me tight. Now, I'm still in their room, but slowly waking up and coming back to the real world. I felt excessively sick this morning, which is why I popped a pill.

I remember last night Emerson yelled at Sebastian for his tattoo. Today he can take the bandages off, and I'm practically obsessed with the ink. He got a tattoo for me, which is amazing. I never thought anybody would care enough to do that. I never thought anybody would care at all. Surprise, my brain chirps in.

We have to make a quick run to the doctor today to get my results from my blood tests. I'm so anxious. I could probably have a panic attack right here if it wasn't for Seb's voice keeping me calm. He isn't even speaking to me, but just hearing the tone of his voice and the familiarity of it is keeping me calm. 

I take a kiss on the cheek from Seb before I head to my room to get changed. I put on a white athletic t-shirt with a pair of pastel pink overalls. I step into my black Converse and brush out my hair before tying it up and stuffing it under a beanie. My bump presses against the overalls quite prominently and the outfit is already getting tight. This is probably the last time I'll get to wear them for months now. 

Once I'm changed and decent, I head downstairs, where Remington already has breakfast ready for me. It's a bagel with cream cheese and buttered rye toast with a glass of orange juice on the side. I hop up onto the barstool (with some struggle, I'm not tall) and start to eat. It's good. The bagel is just the perfect amount of crisp and I'm starving; so I'm sure anything would taste good at this point. 

When I finish, I head to the bathroom to brush my teeth. Sebastian has his keys ready when I re-enter the kitchen. "All set?" I nod, and follow him to Steph's Mini Coop. I'm assuming one of the boys needs the van or something. The drive is only about fifteen minutes, and it's spent in comfortable silence listening to The Rolling Stones and Good Charlotte on the stereo. Neither of us say anything, and neither of us need to. It's not awkward, we're simply sitting and plainly enjoying each other's company.

We pull up to the doctor's office, and Sebastian gives me a reassuring nod before we get out. He takes my hand and walks with me to the doors of the clay, dark brown building. His hand never lets me go, even when he signs me in and walks me into the back room. The room is different for an exam table. There's an oak desk with a computer on it, and then four padded chairs. Sebastian helps me down into one, and tightens his grip on my hand as he sits next to me. He's scared; I can see it on his face. I am, too, but I'm gonna try my hardest not to show it. In the same way that Seb needs to be strong for me, I need to be strong for him. We work in harmony. We need each other. 

Dr. Silver enters the room with a clipboard in her hand. Sebastian pulls me to stand, and we only disconnect our hands for a mere second to shake her hand. As soon as we sit back down, Seb scrambles to find mine once more. His grip is hard, but it doesn't hurt me. It's okay. I'm slouching in the seat as Dr. Silver flips through her papers. My heart pounds. The anxiety is setting in. 

"So we got your test results in this morning," She says and I nod, having no other words. "And everything looks great. Your ultrasound and blood tests show no signs of chromosomal deformities, and as far as everything else looks, you're carrying an incredibly healthy baby, Miss." I smile, and exhale, a huge weight lifted up my chest. Sebastian pulls me to sit up straight, and I can see the relief on his face. We were both worried. This baby means alot to both of us.

Sebastian makes a next appointment for me before we head out to the car once more. Journey blasts from the stereo, and I smile. They're a good band. I really enjoy their music. And it's what stays on the entire way home. 

Emerson's on the front porch smoking when we pull up. His one hand holds his cell phone while his other lifts a lit cigarette to and from his lips. Smoke clouds his features as I shut the car door. "You're gonna have to quit that when the baby gets here." Sebastian says. I cover my mouth with my hand as we get closer to the house. Secondhand smoke is one of the worst things for a baby.

"Why do you think I'm out here? Lottie, inside, now." I rush into the white building I call home, where I immediately collide with Remington.

"Woah; careful, doll." He says as he grabs my wrist just in time to save me from completely falling. He pulls me into his chest, where I use his breathing as reference to even mine out. "You okay?" I nod and hum.

"Just shaken....I'm sorry for running into you,"

"Hey; no worried. We're okay and that's all that matters." I pull on Remington, dragging him towards the stairs. 

"I need to talk to you," He nods, and we head up to his room. I sit criss-crossed across from him, his hands in both of mine. Remington's eyebrows remain raised, and a look of concern is washed over his features. I take a deep breath, and his hands squeeze mine. "I have a problem with something....and I know I can tell you."

"Yeah, of course. What is it?" His left hand leaves mine to cup my cheek, his thumb softly caressing the skin. 

"Emerson.....he's still smoking. And it's not good for the baby now and it's not good for the baby when they're born. I know it's d-dumb but still. This is my kid. I gotta take care of them. And just..." I take a deep breath, but Remington thankfully speaks. 

"Yeah; don't worry, babe. I'll take care of it." I smile, and he kisses my forehead before leaving the room. 

I end up in my bedroom, lying on my side with Caden on Skype. None of us are saying much, but that's okay. I just miss him. "You look anxious," I blurt out without thinking. "I-I mean," 

"No no...I am. You're right. I....have a date with a special guy tonight and I'm super nervous." My eyes go wide. Caden can't score a date for shit. "His name is Jeremy. He's trans. I met him at Support Group a few months back. He's really....sweet and nice and cute and," Caden sighs deeply and smiles, eyes rolling fondly. "Ugh. I'm nervous I'm gonna screw this up."

"Don't. Any dude would be lucky to date you. You're the best best friend I could ever ask for and I'm sure you'll find your guy. It might not be Jeremy but one day you'll find your boy."

"The Seb to my Steph," He laughs. I giggle and shake my head.

"Sure...the Seb to your Steph."