Long-Distance Calls

37

Dear Future,

I know what you're probably thinking.

Why did that accident really happen to Tyler? You can't leave us with an unresolved mystery.

But, as I said from the very beginning, this is not a made up story. This is about real life.

And often, in real life, mysteries are kept unresolved, injustices aren't justified, and lies don't get out.

I never found out what really happened to Tyler. I just learned to live with it, and hoped that whatever villain did that would eventually get some justice.

But, since real life isn't as just as fiction can be, that villain is probably gonna live more than I will. And, unlike movies, he wouldn't come to me twenty years later to clean his soul.

Well, technically twenty years haven't passed yet. But, still, I doubt that'll ever happen.

Tyler's death, though, was an important point of my life.

The day after my talk with the homeless man, I put on some fake RayBan sunglasses, grabbed my savings, and headed to a sports store.

A skinny boy, with a puffy jacket and sunglasses indoors, looked certainly weird around big boys with muscles in places I didn't even have places, but, in that moment, I didn't care.

I couldn't care any less about their judgmental stares as I carefully chose the perfect set of barbells and weights. I even picked a muscle t-shirt, gym pants, and an exercise mat. The Redbull I was sipping on like alcohol definitely helped lowering my anxiety.

They gave me a nice kind of briefcase to put the weights in, and I managed to get out of there satisfied, with a bag that felt bigger than me.

"What the hell did you buy?" my mom asked.

"Some weights," I quickly replied.

"Why?"

"Because I'm too shy to go to the gym," I explained, "so I brought the gym home."

I spent that afternoon learning from tutorials on YouTube all kinds of exercises, from push-ups to sit-ups, to squats, to planks, and to lunges.

I learned all kinds of push-ups with crazy names; diamond, downward dog, star, and even Spider-Man push-ups. I watched videos explaining the right way to lift, and also motivational speeches from Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson.

And then I started. Every single day, exercising and lifting, push-ups and crunches, cranking and banging. I started to feel bigger and stronger. And, maybe, in the first few days it was just an impression, but, as the days went by, I started to really see some muscles showing.

The days of just sitting around, eating junk food and watching movies, seemed to be behind me, now. I was always working out, always with the sweat on my forehead, disheveled hair, and sleeveless shirt. There was always a mat waiting for me in my room. Always a wall to sit against, and try to stay put for as long as I could.

One morning, I decided to call Evelyn during lunch break at school, as I sat alone, far from everyone else. I was getting used to being lonely. I didn't mind it anymore. Not talking to anyone seemed to actually help with my studying, and allowed me to be alone with my thoughts.