Red Eyes and Roses

Chapter 2

I snap my eyes shut in order to clear what I believe I am seeing. Upon opening them, I find that I am standing alone in the doorway and the entire English class is staring at me. Curiosity and confusion plague the room, but one single smirk is all I'm seeing. I realize the boy in my dream mentioned seeing me soon, but he's just a figment of my imagination. In all honesty, I'm most likely imagining his eyes right now. How can a person I've never met before suddenly transfer from the forest to the classroom? It must be impossible!

"Annabella?" Olly gives me a strange look from his chair with his teammates. Where as the only people I am friends with is our small group, Olly is on the soccer team. Around us, he acts like himself. Quiet, caring, and real. When with these boys, he becomes someone else. Loud, rude, and completely ignorant of the rest of us. Soccer may have been a Godsend for his body, but it managed to turn him into an asshole. "Why are you still standing there like an idiot?" The class erupts into laughter and a blush heats my face. I drop my head and rush to my seat not daring to look at the rest of the room.

As I walk without looking, I find it quite difficult to locate my assigned chair. Shocker, right? Of course, I crash straight into someone else whom is already sitting in their seat. I forget about manners and raise my head to meet his eyes. His bright red eyes.

More laughter fills the room, but an aura of tension surrounds us all. I managed to run straight into the new kid. His voice nor his words come out nicely. Completely soaked in attitude and wrapped in anger, he manages to further embarrass me. "Easy there, angel. If you wanted attention you could have asked nicely." The already heated blush spreads to cover my body. I feel it heat me up from my neck down. The trembles start with each place it fills with its unwelcome warmth. Warmth is supposed to comfort you and make you feel secure. The warmth from a blush does not. It burns. Spreading like wildfire all the way down, I know it introduces a panic attack. I know it introduces a problem.

When you make a scene, high school refuses to allow you to forget. Holding your torture in a vice, you shall never forget the pain. The fact that Olly called me out like that means that he caused a scene. A scene directed towards me. In the end, he's the class clown and I'm the idiot involved. The pain increases at the same speed of the whispers.

Slow breathing isn't helping. Counting to ten isn't helping. As the class around me talks in pointed whispers and rude comments, I feel myself start to lose control. Comments on my new appearance, my sudden stop in front of the class, me running into someone. All things that I have managed to do wrong today. I can feel my breathing speed up, my heartbeat following suit. My hands shake, my legs shake, my entire body starts to shake. Nerves well up in my stomach causing a flourish of killer butterflies. No, not butterflies. Wasps. Killer wasps that attack me from the inside out. A headache builds behind my eyes. My eyes that are welling up with tears. My eyes that are flitting around the room at insane speed without making eye contact. The demons in my mind are freed from their cage and welcomed into the open. The open abyss of my mind. Their whispered words are laced with pure venom and hatred. Hatred for my appearance. Hatred for my family. Hatred for my past. Hatred for my friends. Hatred, hatred, hatred.

A voice from the outside manages to pull me from my mind. A voice I've heard once in my sleep and once making my life worse. "You all need to stop and leave her alone! Can't you see that she's not okay!" His voice is soft and warm around my body, but it's not enough. An attractive male decided to protect me, a defenseless female. The other females in this class get louder. More comments from the outside warp into my mind. I can feel the hatred start to claw at my head. I can feel myself giving in.

Suddenly, a rough hand wraps around my shaking arm and lifts me out of my seat. As soon as my feet touch the ground, my legs give out. More laughter surrounds me. More darkness creeps into my vision. More tears drip down my face.

I'm scooped up in someone's arms. No control over my head or body, I lie still. The person tucks my head into their chest and holds me still. Security and happiness surround the air around me, but my demons fight. They fight hard to keep control over my mind and my thoughts. I hear a few muttered curse words from above me. The body holding mine starts to run. Running with me in their arms. Running me out of the room. Running me away from the whispers. Running me out the door and down the hall.

Silence fills the air around me as the person stops moving. I feel the same good emotions try to enter my mind, but I fight them off. My mind refuses to be risen now that I have fallen. The demons reappear. They let me know of their presence. They let me know of their hatred for me. They let me know how weak I am. They let me know how low I can fall. They let me know how selfish I am. I can feel the tears start to fall faster. I can feel the darkness surround me. My demons laugh. My demons enjoy the pain. All of my weakness builds them up. All of my weakness increases their power and gives them control over my being. My eyes remain squeezed shut to try and block out whatever horrid sight is before me.

Despite my heavy mind and pain filled thoughts, the sound of breathing above me comes into recognition. Heavy inhales followed by heavy exhales. Slow and steady, yet worried and heavy. The demons in my mind let up for a second to focus on the calming sound. Soon, my much faster breathing begins to mimic the noises I hear. For the third time today, I can feel much happier thoughts plunge towards me. For the first time today, my demons accept them.

The warmth of sunshine. Roses. The gleeful shouts of people on amusement rides. Roses. The color of sunsets on a lake. Roses. The cries of a baby moments after birth. Roses. The tears of a couple on a wedding day. Roses. The embrace of a mother. Roses. The smell of rain. Roses. The sound of sizzling bread. Roses. The smell of espresso. Roses. The drawings made of chalk in a neighborhood. Roses. The feeling of animal fur beneath hands. Roses. The smell of bonfires. Roses. The slow movement of syrup on fresh pancakes. Roses. The color of fruit juice on hands. Roses. The smile on someone's face. Roses. The twinkling of lights. Roses. Red roses, pink roses, yellow roses, white roses. Roses intertwined with sunflowers. Roses being pollinated by bees. Roses being given on Valentines Day. Roses filling a house to show love. Roses, roses, roses.

I can feel the warmth filling my body. Angels appear behind my closed eyes to fight of my demons. Light against dark. Wings against claws. Happiness against pain. Despite this inner battle, my senses remain focused on the breathing above me. My breathing remains even with theirs. My tears start to dry. The demons fall. The angels win.

My eyes slowly blink open, welcoming the light of a school hallway. Another strong light catches my eye. A person. More specifically, a boy. His body is bathed in red light as he leans against the wall besides me. A face contorted in pain and a body shaking under his weight, yet a slow and steady breathing pattern. My senses pique at the sound of the air leaving and entering him. The same sound of air that I listened to to calm me down. Without a second thought, I raise a shaking hand towards his own. I grasp his in a tight grip, letting his shaking combine with my own. Together, we just breathe.