The One I Love || Newt-TMR

Chapter 49

A/N:
So you may have notice I changed my cover photo again. I'd like to say a massive thanks to Emerald_Bella  for making it for me, along with many other wonderful designs. She is a wonderful person who doesn't ask for anything in return for her work, but I just loved them so much I wanted to thank her and give her all credit. If you like her work, you can see the other cover designs for The One I Love and many others in her book Free Cover Designs!
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I woke up to the sound of a groan. It sounded pained, and reasonably loud. I opened my eyes, expecting to still be in Minho's lap, however I found myself in the other bed tucked in.

Typical Minho, always being the big brother. I thought as I turned over to the side, forgetting the groan all together, until I heard it again. I rolled over, half expecting Minho to be there, but he wasn't. There was just Newt and I, which could only mean one thing; it was Newt.

"Newt?" I called out, not caring how loud I was. I refused to let myself get my hopes up, because in the past week I had done that too often, and it only led to long, sad nights.

I rolled out of bed to stumbled over to Newt's side, my feet heavy against the wooden floor. Out of habit, my hand ran along Newt's as I checked on him, and I found my hand in his. My heart stopped. It literally stopped for a second as my eyes drifted up, and for the first time in a week I saw those russet eyes staring back at me. I couldn't help it, I screamed as tears moistened my cheeks and a surge of pure relief and happiness actually pained my chest.

"Oh my god, Newt!" I choked, holding hands over my mouth. This couldn't be happening, right? Newt couldn't actually be awake right now, this has to be a dream.

"What the bloody hell is goin' on?" Newt barely voiced, his voice thick and husky from lack of use.

"Wait, are you in pain anywhere?" I asked, my voice high with disbelief.

"Well my shuck head hurts, but other than that no." Newt answered, raising a hand to touch his head.

"Good." I cried jumping on the bed to hug Newt. I didn't care how it seemed, I straddled his hips and pulled his upper body up into my chest. I held Newt so hard that I feared he couldn't breathe after the long silence.

"Rosie?" Newt hummed, dropping his arms from my waist.

"Yes?"

"What's going on?" Newt questioned as he held my hand.

"I'm sorry, I'm just so shucking happy right now. Um, how much do you remember?" I asked, getting off of Newt to sit in the chair. As I did so, I never broke eye contact, scared that if I looked away, Newt would be back in a coma.

"I remember chopping down one of the tree's and passing out. How long has it been, why are you so happy?" The questions flowed from Newt's mouth like they did from a Greenie's, but I was happy to answer all of them.

"After you passed out, you fell and hit your head and cut it open. You must have hit it pretty hard, because you went into a coma, and you've been like that for a week." Tears spilled from my eyes as I explained, feeling all the stress and fear and pain from the past week all at once. "I was so scared, Newt. I was looking for you all day, I was trying to sort stuff out because you were mad at me, but then I had to go to work. And then, then they rushed you in, limp, pale and bloodied, and I'll never forget when Clint said you were going into a coma. All I could think about was the last time we spoke, we were arguing."

"Rosie-"

"I never left this room, I still haven't. I'm sorry if I stink like klunk, but I was too scared that if I left your side, something would happen, and I wouldn't be there when it did. But oh god Newt, you're actually awake, and... Here!" I cried with joy. Newt grunted, turning to his side and with his free hand wiped the tears from my cheek.

"Rosie, I'm so so sorry I did this to you." Newt murmured, squeezing my hand.

"What do you mean? Newt, you couldn't help it, you fell it was an accident, right?" Doubt crept into my mind.

"Yes, it was an accident. I could never do that again, especially with you in my life. I'm sorry I burdened you so much. It seems that no matter what I do, I'm hurting you." Newt stammered, tears welling in his own eyes.

"Newt, you're not hurting me-"

"Don't lie, why were you crying before?"

"B-because I was scared." I stuttered, the once sweet moment beginning to turn sour.

"See? I'm not good for you, all I do is worry you. That's not fair."

"What are you trying to say?" Fear froze me, and it was like my world was falling apart. Again.

"I don't think we should be together anymore. I love you more than I could ever love anyone else, and this is killing me, but I couldn't live with myself if I continued to hurt you like this." Newt began to crack, tears spilling from his eyes like a river. I felt my heart quicken, and that same heat of pure fear rushed through my body, almost freezing me in time.

"No, Newt don't do this. Do you wanna know why I was so freaking scared this past week? Because I was petrified that I would lose you. Now this past week was like hell; not because of you being a burden, but because I was terrified that I would lose you. Now I did not go through hell just to lose you all over again. I don't want to hear this klunk 'I'm no good for you', because quite frankly you are the best thing that has happened to me since I got here. Newt, by doing this you're hurting me more than anyone ever could, because I love you. More than anyone." I trailed off, feeling hopeless. My eyes drifted to the ground, too scared to see Newt's face. I felt his hand slip out of mine, and my heart broke. I couldn't hold the whimper in as my hand went cold.

"Rosie, why do you bother with me?"

"Because I love you, and when you love someone you will stop at nothing to give them happiness, no matter how difficult it is. Because there's nothing better than seeing the one you love happy. Nothing could ever amount to how I feel when you smile, and god when you laugh I could die." I closed my eyes, trying to hold back the tears and sobs. How have I managed to lose the one person I loved?

"I really don't deserve you." He sobbed.

"Maybe you do, maybe you don't, but why does that matter? I love you, and you love me; we have since long before the Maze, and we will long after." I felt his warm touch under my chin as he brought my face up to his. Even in the darkness, I could see the tears that streaked his face, and felt fresh ones run along mine. Oh, what a mess we are.

"I'm sorry, my love. I don't ever want to hurt you, ever. I could never love anyone like I love you, and I'm sorry for putting you through all this klunk. I could never live without you, so from this moment onwards, I'm going to do whatever makes me happy. Screw my morals, if I enjoy it I'm going to do it, and nothing brings my joy like being with you. Please, forgive me for what I have put you through." Newt whispered.

"Newt, I forgive you, of course!" I cried, leaning my head on his chest.

"Thank god, now come here." Newt scooted over and pulled me up on the bed, holding me close to him.

"What was it like? Being in a coma I mean." I asked after a long silence.

"It was weird, like a dream, only I could hear everything that was going on around me. My brain would make up a scene for what was going on here. I knew something wasn't quite right, but I could never figure it out." Newt clarified, lacing his hand in mine as I looked up at him. He wore a deep frown, like the one he had for a week. "You cried a lot. I dreamt I was holding you, but you couldn't stop crying no matter what I did or said. It was agony." Newt choked, meeting my eyes.

"I'm just glad it's finally over. I missed you so much, Newt. Please don't ever do that again." I whined, burying my face in his chest.

"Trust me, I'll try." Newt vowed.