CONFESSIONS.

026.

I'm transgender. It's really hard because I live in an unsupportive family, and I have to face my mother shouting at me every day because I'm "stupid, worthless, disgusting, a shame of the family and no one will love me, and I'll die alone because of my stupid choices." If that's not enough, the country I live in is really discriminative and violent against LGBT people, so I walk on the street in constant fear of being beaten up or even worse- killed.  A great friend of mine (who's gay) was beaten so hard he got a few bones crushed and he will never see with his right eye again. My transgender teacher was beaten nearly to death, he was in coma and in hospital for weeks. So it's really brutal. Apparently I'm not completely alone, I've got a girlfriend who is really caring and does everything to cheer me up, she's my only hope. She and a few of my friends (like 2-3 people) call me on my preferred name and pronouns. Most of my friends are okay that I've got a girl by my side and that I look masculine, but they think I'm a lesbian, and I can't even explain them, because they don't understand, or don't want to understand. I know I should be grateful that my friends and classmates "tolerate me" but I wish they would see the boy in me, the effort I have to make to look like a boy, to be respected as a boy, and how hard is to stay strong when things don't want to work out around you.