The Barricade Girl (A Les Miserables FanFiction)

Chapter Sixty-Six

Not wanting to get my hopes up, I try not to let myself believe that this might mean Enjolras is alive. I try to push the thoughts out of my head, making a pact with myself that I'll visit the site tomorrow and try and track Inspector Javert down. That night, Courfeyrac and I tuck Gavroche into his new bed – perhaps the first proper bed he's ever had in his life.

"And this is all mine?" He gasps in excitement as I tuck the sheets in around him. He sleeps in some of Marius' old pyjamas that Auntie kept from when he was younger, and he looks cleaner than I've ever seen him from the bubble bath that we gave him earlier. He'd never had a bubble bath before. I had never seen someone so excited about a bathtub. In a time of so much despair for us, Gavroche had been a little light, lighting up our worlds, allowing us to take a break from the heartache. This little boy was Heaven sent.

"Yes, it's all yours", I laugh as I ruffle his hair. "It's yours forever". I kiss his forehead, and he hugs me goodnight. Courfeyrac does the same, kissing his forehead.

"Goodnight, Juliette. Goodnight, Courfeyrac", he yawns as his sleepy eyes start to close. "I love you".

"We love you too, Gavroche", we whisper, taking one last look at him as he drifts off to sleep – the picture of innocence – and I turn off his light, and Courfeyrac closes the door behind us as we sneak out, not wanting to disturb him.

"I better turn in myself..." I yawn. "Busy day tomorrow. Good night Courfeyrac". I kiss his cheek goodnight.

"What? Where are you going tomorrow?" His forehead wrinkles in confusion.

"Nowhere..." I try to lie.

"Jules. I know you better than that", he raises an eyebrow at me. "I'm going with you".

"I'm going to find Inspector Javert to ask him about that night on the barricade. I'm leaving at 10am. If you're going to insist on accompanying, meet me at the front door", I instruct him. "But not a word to anyone. Not even Maggie. Alright?"

"Alright", he agrees. "Goodnight, Juliette".

I hardly get any sleep, lying awake, thinking about what answers today might uncover, dreaming of how today could end very differently and a lot more hopeful than it began. I try to banish such hopeful thoughts from my head, not allowing my imagination to run away from me. I wake up earlier than I intended, the minutes dragging. I wish I'd told Courfeyrac and earlier time. Yet, it seems like Courfeyrac has been as antsy as me, waking earlier than planned. Neither of us can eat, the knots in our stomachs completely quenching our appetites. We decide to leave earlier, not being able to wait much longer. Trying to be quiet so as not to draw attention to ourselves, we head for the front door. Marius catches us as we open the front door.

"Where are you two sneaking off to?" He hobbles towards us on his cane, stopping us in our tracks.

"Into the city", Courfeyrac answers.

"To pay our respects at the Café Musain", I add, trying to cover our tracks with a half-truth. I can't tell Marius the real reason we're going into the city.

"I'm coming too", Marius grabs his coat from the coat-stand in the hallway.

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" I try to stop him, genuinely worried whether he's ready for something like that.

"I'm coming, Juliette", he says in a way that tells me that there's no argument. Marius is just as stubborn as I am, and I know that there is no stopping him. Thinking of Marius' injured leg, we decide to take one of the groundsmen's wagons. If it were just me going, I would have ridden Maximus. Even so, I guess I should count myself lucky that I have two men in my life who care so much about me that they're so insistent on coming with me. I take matters into my own hands, manoeuvring the small wagon as fast I can, with Maximus at the end of my reins. We ride in silence, all of us too nervous to say anything. It just matters that we're all together – we're content in that. Before we know it, we're in the city. The streets seem so quiet now. Life carries on – merchants selling, people buying, couples walking arm in arm. Life has continued when ours has fallen apart – the world has kept turning. We drive through the square where we had that first rally. Where Enjolras had spoken so passionately, and he had first kissed me. The memories come flooding back, and I can almost hear his voice filling the city streets as he spoke, the sound of our boys rallying the support of the people. The silhouette of the Café Musain comes into view as we turn into our street – the one that served as the home of our little makeshift family. I bring Maximus to a halt, and the boys climb out of the wagon. Courfeyrac offers me his hand, helping me down. We stand there, in the shadow of the Café Musain, looking up at the old familiar window. I see the wall I sat against the first day I came here. "I'm sorry, but I don't allow men to sit on this wall!" The voice of a past me – a happy me – echoes through my head. I smile at the memory. I was so sassy to him. If only I'd known then what I know now. If only I'd known how important that cocky boy dressed in burgundy would come to mean to me. If only I had appreciated him more when he was here – how much time we wasted, sniping at one another, seeking to get one up on the other. If I'd known how little time we would have had together, I would have wasted no time in falling in love with him.

We walk through the front doors of the Café Musain. Without having to think about it, muscle memory kicks in, and we head straight for the stairs, entering that small room where we met so often. Part of me expects that I'll walk up the stairs and be greeting by their smiling faces, catching the sight of Enjolras staring intently at some new paper he's written, or Jehan playing his violin softly in the corner, filling the room with his music, or Grantaire, offering a bottle of alcohol to anything that breathed. What I would give to see them again, to be greeted by their presence again. Even Grantaire.

"It looks so different", Courfeyrac gently breaks the silence.

"It looks so empty", Marius adds, tears forming in his eyes.

"They should be here...they should all be here..." I wipe a stray tear from my cheek. "I'll be back in a moment", I head for the stairs, determined to find Inspector Javert, but not wanting to reveal my plan to Courfeyrac and Marius. I leave the two of them in the room and go downstairs. I take in my surroundings. I've never seen it like this. This place used to be buzzing with Madame Houcheloup's regular customers. I wonder to myself what might have happened to her, and I pray that she's okay. I walk towards the front doors to leave the building, but I hear a voice. A woman's voice. Singing aloud to herself. I whip my head around, and Madame Houcheloup appears in the kitchen doorway, wiping her hands on her apron.

"Madame!" I gasp. She snaps her head up to look at me, and her eyes widen in surprise as she opens her arms to embrace me.