The Barricade Girl (A Les Miserables FanFiction)

Chapter Eighty-Eight

       

The colour drains from Marius' face, and all he can do is stare. The room is still deadly silent. Grandfather, not registering the reason for it, strides over to Marius to reprimand him for his outburst.

            "What is the meaning of all this?" Grandfather grabs Marius' shoulder, and then sees Enjolras standing by my side. "My..." He can't get his words out, and instead, much to my own surprise and to Enjolras', pulls Enjolras to him, swallowing him in a hug. "My boy...We thought you were...It's a miracle..." He utters, barely audible. Gavroche lets go of Maggie, releasing the hand that he's been clutching on to for the last few minutes, and catapults himself toward Enjolras, tears in his eyes as his little body crashes against him.

            "You came back", Gavroche cries. Enjolras crouches down, taking Gavroche's face in his hands, wiping away the boy's tears while his own fall freely, causing my tears to start all over again. Enjolras looks right into Gavroche's eyes.

            "I'll always come back for you, Gavroche. Always", he says, scooping Gavroche up into his arms. He places on arm around me, holding Gavroche with the other. "I'm just sorry it took so long..."

            "You're here now..." I whisper, taking in the image before me, and wiping the hair out of Gavroche's eyes.

            "What was Heaven like?" Gavroche asks.

            "What?" Enjolras smiles at him.

            "Juliette says you went there", he answers.

            "Gavroche", I smile, putting a finger to my mouth to try and get him to be quiet.

            "Heaven is like Juliette..." Enjolras replies. "One glimpse of her, and you've had glimpse of Heaven enough to last you until you get there for real..."

            "Yuck..." Gavroche pulls a face. "Is Grantaire with you? And the others?" His face brightens up again. If Gavroche thinks that Enjolras really went to Heaven, and that Heaven is a place that you can visit for a holiday and return from just as easily, then his little imagination must really be getting his hopes up. A knot forms in my stomach at the thought of his hopes coming crashing back down.

            "I'm sorry, Gavroche..." Enjolras says quietly, holding him close. "I'm sorry for all of this..."

            "I'm glad you're home", Gavroche places his little hands on Enjolras' cheeks, and wipes away a stray tear that is trickling down his face.

            "And I won't ever leave you again", Enjolras sincerely reassures him.

            "We get to be a proper family now!" Gavroche smiles, realising that all he had ever wanted has come true.

            "We do..." Enjolras tries to smile back, but the hurt is still there in his eyes, the sting of Gavroche's previous question still burning a hole in his heart. Enjolras' gaze returns to Marius, who still hasn't said a single word. The entire room holds its breath, waiting to hear what he might say. Marius takes a step toward Enjolras, as if he might say something. Enjolras places Gavroche on the ground, waiting for whatever Marius might do. Instead of saying anything, all Marius can do is place is arms around his best friend – the best friend he thought he'd lost – and he weeps. "I'm sorry..." I can hear Enjolras whispering to Marius. "I am so sorry..." The hold on to each other for dear life. "It's all my fault..."

            "No. It isn't", Marius manages to respond. "We were in it together. We decided together. Don't let our boys' deaths be in vain by apologising now. We can't apologise. We can't regret what happened, otherwise their sacrifice means nothing. We can't let them die in vain..." Marius places a hand on Enjolras' shoulder, who nods in appreciation at his words. They share a reminiscent, yet mournful smile, and hug once more. The guests begin to lightly chatter.

            "Congratulations, by the way", Enjolras pats Marius' back. Marius beckons Cosette over, and Enjolras politely kisses her hand. For the first time, the four of us are together – the four of us married – brother and sister, brother-in-law and sister-in-law. A sight I never thought I would see. To think that this could have ended so differently. A mere hour ago, I was at this wedding alone. I was a widow. A single mother. And now, my life is more complete than I could have ever imagined it to be. And I am grateful. My heart is full. But something is missing. My eyes fall on Cosette. She seems so blissfully happy, yet underneath all the celebration and happiness of the day, she is hurting. For her, there is a hole in her heart that cannot be filled by anyone but the one who made it – her Father. I feel a sudden pang of guilt. Her Father sits at home, nursing my children, and here she is on her wedding day, unable to share this milestone with the man who had her heart long before Marius came on the scene. I can't help but think of how I had felt without Enjolras, and the unbelievable and unimaginable joy I felt with him back at my side, and I could not live with myself if I stood in the way of Cosette feeling the same joy. I couldn't deprive her of that. While her Father is alive, she ought to be with him. Soaking up every last moment she can. We are on borrowed time. Nothing is promised. No-one knows what a day may bring. Enjolras and I are proof of that. And so I decide, right there, in the middle of the wedding reception, that Cosette's day will look very different from how it started. I grab Enjolras' hand.

            "Enjolras, we have to go!" I say, a steely determination in my voice.

            "Juliette, he just got here –" Marius tries to argue.

            "You have to come too. You and Cosette. There's something Cosette has to see..."