Black Ink || Harlena a.u.

57.

My first day had been more than great. I even got a kick calling Harry by his last name after reading paper after paper with it marked on almost all of them. He was surprised at first, but then his sheepish smile took over. It was weird to think that after these past months, I only knew his first name. Actually, I realized I didn't know much about him. We've been focused on all the other things, we haven't gotten too personal about our lives.

But then I thought about how different our way of meeting and our sudden rendezvous had been, that it actually wasn't quite surprising that we didn't know every little detail about each other. I thought about it, but then I thought about how great it was working with him and how his teasing movements only added to the foreplay. He even kissed me everytime he walked by to retrieve something from the back.

In addition to the in between kisses, and not-so- subtle glances Harry and I threw at each other, the work load had been too easy.

Now I was back home and impatiently waiting for tomorrow.

Anne was drying her hair, wearing her fluffy slippers I got for her almost a year ago. She was ruffling her hair with her towel while I flipped through my choices on Netflix.

Something had shifted between Anne and I since we last talked about my whole ordeal. She didn't crack Anne jokes and she didn't make the entire atmosphere lighten up anymore. She didn't ask about Harry, talked about Liam, or her well paying job after her promotion. Not even the gossip that came with it. There were no more girls night out or shared meals. There were only two people living in the same place with nothing but mundane interests at this point.

There was a feeling deep within me that realized that it wasn't just Anne that had changed. Her goals had changed too.

Right now, her dullness came from the fact that she wanted to enjoy her life next to Liam, but was unable to because she felt like she had the obligation to stay.

The thought of weighing someone down depressed me, making me shift uncomfortably at the unspoken but mutual thought.

"Anne," I cleared my throat.

She looked at me from her place, "Yeah?"

My teeth gnawed my lip, "I think you should move in with Liam."

She gave me a funny look, "I will, but not until-"

"Yeah," I gave her a pointed look. "Not until I got a job and I did. You don't have to hang around anymore and sulk."

Her eyebrows raised in offence, "Hang around and sulk?" She scoffed, "I stayed to make sure you were able to stand on your own two feet, and now you're kicking me out?"

"I'm not kicking you out," I retorded. "I'm saving you the unwanted looks of boredom and unhappiness."

"Are you serious, right now?" She marched to stand in front of me so that I wouldn't have to twist my neck at her anymore. "I've been having to hold off on my boyfriend because I want to make sure I don't ditch my best friend, and all I get is you throwing the fact at my face."

I rolled my eyes, "Please. I can practically see the reluctance radiating off you. I'm not saying I'm not grateful because trust me-" my hands freeze in front of me. "I am. You came with me when no one else did and you've always been there for me when I feel like absolute shit and I never know how to repay you," I couldn't help my rambling. "But the the only thing I can do to show my gratitude is to stop depending on you to be there for me and let you live your life with the man you love instead of holding onto you because you've been my only constant and I'm-" I feel the words getting caught in my throat. "I'm sorry-"

Stunned at my words, Anne cuts me off with her stomach pressed against my face and her arms wrapped around me. I can feel her hand moving up and down my back, "I'm so sorry, Anne." I can't help but sob into her soft pijama.

"Hey, now," her voice cracks. "You've done more than repay me for running away with you," she chuckles sadly.

Anne takes a seat next me on the couch, she pulls my head onto her lap as she runs her fingers through my hair.

"You know my mom was just like yours, wanted the same thing for me and when the-" I could hear the struggle in her words. "When the incident happened I just had to find a new environment. I couldn't stay to live in the same area as him, but my parents refused to move from the comfort of their own home to allow me to gain that peace of mind I lost after the attack-" I knew what she meant and how hard it was for Anne to speak about her ex boyfriend that assaulted her after she broke up with him.

"You were my escape, Selene. It didn't matter where we went, I had you. You pushed me to find myself again and to trust other people again. I mean, that's how I managed to meet Liam and all the other guys before him. I gave you support but you gave me my life back." I looked up to see her tears running down her cheeks before I sat up and wrapped my arms around her.

She hugged me back and we just sat crying and meantally thanking one another for the friendship that brought more stability than both our families combined. Hell, Anne was my family, she was my sister.

"I'm scared of leaving, Selene," she admitted after a while. The tv was off, we were both just cuddling one another. "I'm scared of falling too hard and then gaining one more disappointment."

I frowned, "You know that whatever happens I'm always going to be ready to welcome you back in. But I'm sure I won't need to." It was true, "Liam's come a long way, and so have you."

She sighed, "You think so?"

"Mhm," I smiled. "I've seen the way he looks at you, the way he holds you... as if he could lose you at any second. I don't see much of that anymore."

She smiled, "He is pretty amazing."

I nod.

"What about you and Harry?"

I can't help the foolish smile at the mention of his name, "I'm falling so hard, Anne."

It feels good to be honest. I missed having that with Anne.

She chuckles, but then goes serious, "Do you love him?"

The question catches me off guard. Sure, I have strong feelings for Harry; feelings I haven't felt for a really long time, and even then, not entirely because this feels foreign.

"Harry is different than the guys I've been with before. He's addicting, almost impossible to ignore the fact that he's so... liberating." It's hard not to fall into the high that he brings after taking a doze of him.

I had never felt so sure of anyone else like I did with Harry.

"I feel like," I swallow. My eyes look at Anne's shirt, but my mind runs to where it wants to be. "I'm falling into Harry." I jumped off the ledge, but it's hard to see if Harry's waiting to catch me or if I'm going to face the harsh truth sooner or later. "And I don't think I want to stop."

Anne shifts from beside me, cutting my trance so that I'm looking at her serious expression, "Selene-" her features slowly changed into a knowing look. "You're in love with Harry."

I blink at her before her words register into my brain... and I feel it. The warmth that spreads throughout my chest at the thought that makes my mind go hazy and into swirls that blur the lines between what I know and what I thought I knew. But even through the mess that is my brain, she's right.

I'm in love with Harry Styles.

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