Marching On The Club Book 3

Chapter 19

Chapter 19
The bell rang for lunch. I packed my bags and I got all my stuff together to leave my Chinese 2 class. At last I can finally get a break from Timothy at least for nearly half an hour before having to tolerate him yet again in band class. I was the last person to leave the classroom for I was taught that the bell does not dismiss you; the teacher dismisses you. But Mrs. Mei didn't say anything as the bell rang and everyone got out of their seats and left the classroom in a hurry to get lunch and meet up with all of their buddies somewhere on the school campus. I walked out of the door and took a left in the hallway. There were several students at their lockers getting their lunch boxes, and lunch money and trading in their binders and books for their other binders and books needed for the last half of the school day. I paid no attention to them, and I kept walking straight towards the doors. I walked through the doors, and outside to the bridge just above the courtyard. I saw a glimpse of Drew walking out of the set of doors on the other end of the bridge. Drew was walking and talking with Brandon. I ignored their faces hoping that they won't see my face as I walked on by. The both of them turned towards the stairs on the right; my right, but their left. They seemed to not notice me. I continue to walk to the end of the bridge. I opened the door on the end of the bridge, and I kept on walking through the hall. I made a left turn afterwards. There were more students at their lockers; some with their friends and others who weren't with their friends. I kept walking down the hall of building three of the second floor. I passed by several posters on the wall, some about clubs and AP classes. I kept walking by; not even looking at any of the posters on the wall. Until I ran across one poster that caught my eye. From far away it looked as if the poster had a scar on it; like it was hand drawn. When I got closer to the poster I stopped dead in my tracks to see what it says. It was a poster about suicide prevention, and it showed the signs of suicide taped on the wall. I looked both sides to make sure no one was looking, and I took my phone out and shot a photo of it. 'This is a reminder that I'm not alone,' I thought. I continued to walk down the hall, and soon enough I caught up with Erin, Johanna and Isabel. They were busy talking at Erin's locker, and so I could just sneak on by without them noticing. Or so I thought. "Hey Jennifer!" I quickly turned to face Johanna. "How are you," she asked. "Um... I'm good!"
"Are you sure you don't want to talk about anything," she asked. "Why would I want to talk about something?"
"Jennifer, we are here for you if you need anything at all," Johanna said.
"And what makes you think that there's something wrong?"
"Oh you know, what comes around goes around. And we just heard someone say that you were in pain, so I just want you to know that if you need anything at all; we'll be right here for you. Please know that you're not alone, and that you can trust us. We are one big family Jennifer, and I want you to know that!" My heart broke when she said the word family. "Oh well, okay. Thanks," I said as I walked away. 'I'm sorry, but the marching band no longer feels like a family. Not to me anyways,' I thought to answer Johanna, but I didn't want to argue with my previous section leader so I choose to just leave it.
I ate lunch really quickly at the flag pole. I was alone. William no longer attended the school, and the band room no longer feels the same way as it did two years ago, and so I decided to leave the one and only place that I called home. Now I must find some other place to call home. Or at least, my home away from home. I mean, my house that I live in is pretty cool. It's good enough to call home, but I just mean with the band family. No, I mean at school. I want to feel comfortable in school again. I mean, I do feel comfortable in school; I just mean feel like I belong somewhere other than my home. I felt kind of like crying. I was alone, and I really had no one to talk to now that William's gone. I mean, yeah he's still in the marching band, but he's no longer at the school. I must move on, but I feel like I can't. And it's not just him being gone that's making me feel the way I feel. Ever since Katherine joined the band room to eat lunch in; I just stay away from her. I stay away from them all because Katherine seems to be the leader out of everyone in there. Besides, Stephen Anderson is there. I have nowhere else to go. I'm on my own now. I can't trust anyone. Besides, William when he's at rehearsal. But otherwise, I must man it up and go through all of this own my own.