The Heart Wants What It Wants

Chapter 17

Nicole's POV

"What?" Jared was baffled.

"You heard me. I'll let you explain everything, but we're done after that. I made a huge mistake and my life is a complete mess right now, so it would be best if we didn't see each other anymore."

"You can't do that. After everything that we've been through. After everything that you've been through. You didn't run away with me out of a whim, you did because you lo..."

"Because I was a fool," I interrupted him and faced him with serious face, and Jared couldn't believe what he was hearing. "I knew I didn't love Lucas anymore, and you were just a perfect excuse for me to ditch him and justify my actions with myself. I thought I had some deeper feelings for you, but I was wrong. There, I said it," I lied hoping to push him away and make this break up as easier for him, but little did I know Jared was not the one to give up on someone he cares about.

"You don't mean that," Jared said confidently coming near me as I started to tremble the more closer he came to me.

"Yes I do," I tried to persuade him, but my body was giving me away. I couldn't stop crossing my arms over my chest, and I could barely look at him. I wanted to push him away so badly, but I guess he wasn't that easy to chase away.

"Don't do that, Nicole, please," he said with the softest voice that only melted my heart.

"I'm not doing anything," I said turning away from him.

"You are pushing me away, and you know that's not the right thing to do."

"You pushed yourself away when you knocked that girl up," I said angrily.

"That's not my baby, I didn't do it," Jared said and hugged me from behind holding me tight in his arms. For a minute, I could forget about all the drama and the misery, once I felt his warm embrace. God, I loved when he held me. It was the safest place in the world. Until it wasn't anymore.

"No!" I ripped myself out of his arms as tears started running down my face, "You can't just waltz back in here, and think I'd give in under your touch."

"That's not what I was trying to do. I just want you to listen to me, damn it!" now Jared was pissed as I have never seen him before.

"Why? So you could act your way around me? Forget it!" I wiped the tears off my face, and turned my back to Jared, walking away from him. The last thing I wanted was for him to see my tears. He didn't deserve any single one of them.

"I have never lied to you. And I'm not about to start now! Just sit down, and listen to me."

"Fine," I sat down on one side of the couch and Jared sat on the other one, "I'm listening."

"I had an on and off kind of a fling with a girl from Italy. Her name is Michaela, and she is a model. We'd spend time together every time I stayed in Italy for more than a week and we just ... had fun," Jared said and my stomach turned just at the thought of him being with another woman. "The last time we saw each other was about 6 months ago, and she had told me she's going to Africa for some charity with UNICEF. She's a great contributor and loves to help kids. Anyway, I haven't seen or heard from her ever since, until a couple of days ago."

"When she walked in OUR room, pregnant," I said ironically, "That was her that day, and not Emma, right?"

"Yes, but, please, don't interrupt me," Jared said nervously with a low voice, closing his eyes as a little vein popped underneath his left eye. I could tell he was really pissed off.