Say You Won't Let Go

Revealed Secrets

"Got your lunch?" Lauren asks as I'm putting my jacket on and she is slipping her shoes on.

"Yeah." I nod, zipping it up.

"I got my bag." She reaches to the floor and picks up the bag I gave her yesterday which is now filled with her few valuables.

"No." I whine, grabbing onto her arm and pouting up at her. "Stay tonight, too."

"I don't want to bother your dad." Lauren juts out her bottom lip to sympathize with me.

"Come on," I drawl, sparking a smile from the green eyed girl. "He doesn't care."

"Sure, he doesn't care for now. But I need somewhere permanent to settle down. Somewhere I can call home." Lauren's voice sounds wistful and light.

I sigh and dip my head down. "I suppose. But where will you go?"

"I—"

I immediately cut her off with another thought. "What if you can't find a place tonight? Will you come back?"

Lauren's gaze softens and she smiles faintly. "Yes, Camz. If I can't find a place tonight, I'll come back."

We stand in silence by the door for a few seconds before I lunge forward and wrap my arms around her neck, sighing into her ear. She hugs me back, her arms making their way to around my waist.

"It will be okay." She promises.

I nod, not sure how to respond or even what I should say.

"Let's get to school." Lauren says, letting go of me. I feel uneasy without her warmth but she quickly grabs my hand instead. As our fingers intertwine, a smile grows on my face.

We head out the door and shuffle outside. The winds have gotten warmer, which is strange because it's mid-December.

"Are we going to walk to school?" I ask, looking over to the girl beside me.

"Uh, what else would be walk to?" Lauren furrows her eyebrows with affection and humor.

"I meant," I giggle slightly at my previous question. "Are we going to walk to school like this?"

"Hand in hand?"

"Yeah."

Lauren bites her bottom lip. "Yes."

"Are you okay with that? I mean, all these years of pushing your sexuality down and—"

"Camz," Lauren smiles gently, reassuring all the nerves that were growing and bouncing in my stomach. "I'm proud of whatever we have. I'm proud of us. You make me... happy. And not a lot people have the capability to do that. And if people see us and speculate that I'm gay, then what's new?"

A grin glows on my face and I quickly pull myself up and kiss her cheek.

"I'm proud of us, too. Particularly, you." I send her a fond gaze.

"Why me?" She hums, rubbing her thumb over my hand soothingly.

"You've been through so much. Hell, you've never been able to be authentically you." I frown.

Lauren shrugs. "So? That was then. This is right now. Life goes on. We either make the most of it or we let it burn."

I smile sadly and squeeze Lauren's hand tightly. "There won't be any wildfires 'round here."

Lauren laughs softly. I furrow my eyebrows and gaze at her curiously. "What?"

She shrugs and shakes her head, a smile affection on her face. "I just don't know where you've been all my life."