Fire Beneath Me || L.S.

Because It's a Sin

Harry's POV

I breathed in the cold crisp air that hit my cheeks, its stung but some how it was comforting. the sky was dark and cloudy i watched the rain drops fall and instantly hit the pavement. I carefully tried to get in a more comfortable position but i dont think sitting on the hard floor in the cold could get any better. I eyed the door as the brown haired, blue eyed boy dressed in black came out of the school building.

I tried to avoid him after the mark he had made its was still on my skin but it was fading, i tired hard to cover it up but eventually my father saw. He wasn't exactly excited about the fact i had the mark on my skin and said he would teach me a lesson about how boys shouldn't have hickeys from other boys because its a sin , but if its sin maybe im a sin.

He reached for his pocket and pulled put a cigarette and put it to his lips, i watched as the smoke escape his lips and surrounded him. I still pondered on why he would give me a hickey i just couldn't get over it, i kept playing the moment in my head constantly but what i wouldn't forget is the pain the i felt when i was taught my lesson. My thoughts were interrupted as i saw him standing in front of me.

"why were you staring at me, were you having some gay fantasy" he asked

"w-what no" i replied i got up to meet him at eye level

"you'd like that wouldn't you, fag"

" yea ok said the one who gave me a hickey" i said quietly

"What?! Im not gay like you" he yelled, i flinched at the tine of this voice

" i never said you were" i replied in a louder voice

"you implied it "he stated

"its not like you necessarily come off as straight" i said

"Whatever, i dont have to waste my time one someone as useless as you" he said as he pushed me into the wall, i groaned and flinched because of the soreness of my body he noticed and his face immediately softened.

"Shit, im sorry i didnt know- did he hurt you" he asked

"why do you care, you're the one that cause it" i sneered

He looked confused then his eyes dropped to the mark he made and it all made sense to him and said "i didnt know im sorry"

i couldn't believe his words, i dont think he meant it but i was so angered by the fact that, he made the mark and i was punished because of it but mostly mad at myself that i let it happen and it was my fault.

Before i knew it i was on top of him hitting him repeatedly, and he wasn't blocking it, he wasnt defending him self. i stopped in instantly regretted him knowing how it felt to be hurt, i got off of him and said "oh my god im s-sorry i didnt mean, ill get you fixed up"

"its fine" he said

"no please, ill take you to my house i can clean you up there" i said

"Are you sure he wont be there" he asked

"He isnt here he left he wont be back till a few days" i said

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I sat close to him, dabbing the cotton pad on his skin, "sorry" i said as i saw him hiss when i touched it. I looked at his eyes they were crystal blue, so clear but not as bright as i remembered, something was missing.

"So why didn't you fight back" i asked

"You seem like you needed some sort of relief its the only thing i could think of that would give someone the relief" he said

There's many ways to feel relief, if only you knew

" so what did you mean, i was the one that i was the one that caused it" he asked but it seemed like he knew the answer

"It's nothing" i told him. i got up so i would avoid anything else he wanted to ask, but i felt him get up to and make his way towards me, he lightly turned me around and i was standing face to face with him

"i really am sorry" he said

i nodded trying not to break eye contact and i his eyes flicker at my lips and licked his, i felt him leaning in and i was hesitant at first but gave in i could almost feel his lips touching mine

"Harry im home where are you love!" i heard my mom yell, i pulled away as she entered the kitchen

"Lou, what are you doing and what happened to your face" she asked

"oh its nothing i'm fine" he responded giving a smile

"oh well im glad you're here, your mother told me that she'd be away for a few days so y our welcome to sleep here if you'd like" she said

"oh thank you" he said

"Well im off i just came to get a few things, ill see later alright" she told me I nodded in response and she said goodbye to Louis. Some how we ended up in my room and chatted about the most random things, there was silence before he spoke

"Can i see it? What h-he did?"he asked

Wh-what? Why?"

"Please harry, let me see" he said

i shook my head, i dont want him to see the way i see myself, before i knew it his hand were around my shirt and pulling on it, he looked at me and i nodded. My shirt was pulled of exposing the bright marks of his fists being marked on my skin, cuts that will eventually fade into scars but will forever be imprinted on me along with the pain.

Bruises that were starting to fade along with fresh ones some over old ones, marks from anything he could find that was near he he could use as a weapon. The biggest bruise was on my rib cage that hurt each time i took s breath its as if he wanted me to regret each time i inhaled and exhaled.

His hands lightly touched it and i flinched, i didn't want to look at my body, i was looking at the ceiling trying hard not to cry, as i felt the burning sensation in my eyes.

"oh, Harold" he said in a shaky breath

I didn't want to make eye contact with him, he touched every scar,bruise and mark thats on my body.

"look at me? please" he asked

i couldn't and felt his hand bringing my chin down to make eye contact with him, his eyes we filled with hurt. I felt the tears start going down my face, i broke. He held me on my bed and i sobbed, yelling as loud as i could because i felt like now is when i could get it out not all of it but some of it

"I'm sorry" i choked

"You don't need to be sorry love he should be the one who's sorry" he said runing his hand through my curls.

"H-he's right! I am a sin" i yelled in between breaths

"No you're not. shh you are fine now" he assured me

i kept crying and i put my face into the croak of his neck, he pulled away and cupped my face with his hand and spoke "im here now, you're safe he cant hurt you". He cleaned my tears and looked at my lips he looked at my eyes and then back at my lips as he licked his.

He leaned in and so did i, i felt his soft lips against mine , he kissed me and was gentle with each movement like if he were scared that i was going to break.

I couldn't believe this was real i kept thinking that my father would come out of no where and break us apart, i pushed those thoughts aside and savored the kiss. It was as if all my worries, self loathing and the world went away it was just us and i felt...

content,

relief.