my mind and body
are both tired
especially when
they cannot afford to do so
go to bed
you'll get another migraine
my words get caught
and go over speed bumps
in my throat
but i manage to croak out
soon, i only have a little bit left
but there is never just a little bit left
there is always more
and then some
but soon my body cannot stay awake any longer
so like clockwork
i put my work on the floor next to where i sleep
so that it is not wasted and forgotten the next day
i turn on the fan, not to be cold
because my room is already freezing
but because i need the noise
as i have grown so
accustomed to it
i cross the mess that is my floor and weakly
fumble
at the light switches
i crawl into bed
making sure that my
out of body brain
is plugged in
i lose myself in a muddle of sheets and
stare off into the
empty dark
while i wait
for slumber to overcome my aching body
but now my body is asleep
but my mind is not
she is wide awake and
buzzing and fretting
and doing everything that she can
other than sleeping
i curse my mind
she never listens
there is no off button
there is no way to unplug her
my fingers fumble at the sheets
the muscle memory of them dancing
flying
across the keyboard
still fresh in my thoughts
i want to sleep
i cannot sleep
i will wake up with a migraine
-n.c
