Anywhere With You - A Lauv Fanfiction

9. I Kind Of Am

We sat at the edge of the bridge, dangling our feet between the bars. It was probably 2am by now, with how long we've been talking.

We continued our conversation.

"So, you have fans then. Like huge fans?" I asked.

"I do. And they're the reason that everything is so rewarding for me. Tour, shows, long nights making songs, losing sleep, that's all worth it."

"That's amazing to me. Don't girls just throw themselves at you?"

He laughed. "Yeah, some do. It's kind of new to me, but I saw a lot of it on the tour."

"How many girls do you take on dates?" I questioned.

"I haven't been on a real date with a girl for a long time." He said. For some reason, I don't know if I believed him.

"Why?" I asked.

"Well, you said you haven't been on a date in 2 years. Why to you?" He countered.

"I just haven't been that interested in anyone." I shrugged.

"Same here." He nodded. "I was too scared to even hand you a note with my number on it, let alone ask you on a date in person."

"But, I'm really not that special. I don't want you to be disappointed with me." I began. "I have thoughts and hopes and dreams and feelings, but so does every other girl. I'm not one of the special ones or anything."

"Aria, I wanted to beat myself up after seeing you at that stoplight and turning right. I wanted to go back and ask you what your name was. I can't even tell you how I felt when I saw you at the smoothie place. Something just pulls me towards you."

Why me? If he has girls throwing themselves at him left and right, there's nothing special about me. Maybe our emotions are just running extremely high tonight and things will be different when the sun comes up. He'll change his mind, and I won't be feeling like this either. My feelings are just moving too quick, and his are too. It shouldn't be like this.

"I leave in a week and a half." I said. "After that, it's back to Seattle and you're here."

"Well, I have your number. And a week and a half is a good amount of time. Consider my schedule cleared." He said.

"But, Harper's here too." I explained.

"Sam was all googly over her when we left. I can set them up and maybe we could all do something. If not, that's fine."

I smiled big. "Oh yeah, she'd love that."

He laughed. "Did she say something about him?"

I nodded. "She was googly over him too. I think that whole thing would work out pretty good."

My phone buzzed in my pocket, and I took it out.

Harper: are you good??

"Harper's asking if I'm okay. Maybe I should go back."

"Tell her you're alive." He said.

Me: I'm good :) are you?
Harper: it's 2am duuuude!! what are y'all doing?? Are you at his place ;)

Ari laughed at her response.

"Oh my." I said.

Me: we're right outside of the city. I'll be at the hotel soon as long as you're good??
Harper: I'm all good. wake me up when you're here lol

I put my phone back away.

"What did you mean when you said you don't do relationships? What happened to make you do that?" Ari questioned.

"I just reserve myself out of the way of heartbreak. I've seen it happen to so many girls and it's so destructive. I don't want that."

"But how do you know if something is going to end in heartbreak? I think if you're going into something believing that that'll be the outcome, then you're setting yourself up." He said.

"Ahh, I don't know. I just hated seeing all my friends go through it. Even my mom." I blurted.

"Your mom? What happened?" He asked.

"Um, my dad. He passed away in a bike accident 2 years ago. It was hard on all of us, and seeing my mom like that was terrifying."

"I'm- I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bring anything up."

"It's okay, I can talk about it." I nodded. "It's still hard. But my mom didn't get out of bed for weeks. She stopped eating. She stopped doing a lot of things, and it took so much for us to get her back on her feet again."

"I guess I can understand why you feel that way. Love is scary." He said. "I honestly believe it's all worth it, no matter what."

"We all think of things differently." I replied.

"I like the way you think of things, though." He pointed out.

"Even if I think a lot different than you?" I asked.

He looked out at the water and the distant lights in the city. "Especially."

"Why so?" I turned my head and looked where he was looking. Los Angeles is gorgeous.

"Because I know I can change your mind."

I looked at him again, and he had a dumb grin.

"Oh, you really seem confident about that one." I smiled.

"I kind of am."