21. Forget

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Harper and I walked back to my car, and she agreed to driving back to the hotel. I dragged myself into the passenger seat, rubbing the mascara from under my eyes.

Sometimes things are too good to be true. I mean, I've only been around him for a few days, but I've gotten to know him so well. He told me about his family. He told me his fears and his beliefs and his insecurities. I told him mine. He told me how he likes his coffee. What annoys him. What makes him happy. I told him my fear of love, and why I am the way that I am. We slow danced. We kissed. I got to know him so well.

Ari wasn't just a random boy I met a few days ago. He obviously meant a lot to me in just these few days, until he drove me way off that path with what just happened.

Harper started the car, still obviously aggravated over the whole thing.

Just as she was putting our hotel into the GPS, my phone lit up with a call from Ari. I showed it to Harper, and she scrunched her eyebrows. "See what he has to say."

It took everything I had in me to answer.

I didn't even say anything, I just sat there.

"Hello?" He spoke into the phone. It suddenly sounded like he hasn't slept in a few days.

"Hi." I said quietly.

"Where are you? Aria, I really can explain. You just have to give me a chance to. Please?" He said. I took a deep breath.

"I know I probably don't have the right to be upset, but I am. And I'm sorry. But this proves my point to all of my fears and seeing that happen honestly tore my heart up. You might be better off being able to do things like that after shows and not having to worry about anything. I really don't want to be in your way, Okay?" I said. Harper looked at me with wide eyes, impressed to hear me speaking my mind.

"No no no, Aria- she's just-" He began.

"I think you're amazing, but stuff like this isn't meant for me. Sorry, Ari. Bye." I hung up.

Harper held up her hand for a high five. I gladly accepted.

My phone vibrated.

Ari: i didn't even get a chance to explain the situation. please let me at least do that?

I didn't even have to think about what I wanted to reply.

Me: you don't need to feel upset or sorry about it. and i don't want an explanation. it's alright.

Ari: but i want a chance with you. that's all i want. she literally jumped onto me, and i didn't want it.

I replayed the image of his whole shirt unbuttoned, and the lipstick on him. His arms weren't around her- but the lipstick on his neck and face just proves how long he let it happen, I guess.

He texted again.

Ari: i won't lie to you aria, i used to hook up with her. she came in there and immediately started that whole thing up. she took her shirt off and unbuttoned mine. i felt sick when she was kissing me. if you hadn't of walked in, it would have ended there anyways. i felt sick about all of it

I showed Harper, and she didn't look as upset anymore. "He seems sincere but it doesn't excuse it."

I thought some more. It's true, he's being sincere. But he knows damn well that things like this are what scares me. If we would have been in a relationship for a long time like Harper and her ex and this happened, I'd be completely shattered. But Ari and I are not together. Needless to say... we are far enough into something starting that I do have a reason for crying and wanting to remove myself from this whole thing.

Me: i understand. i believe you. but i just don't think this whole thing's for me. it's really just not.

Ari: please. please please please let me make this up to you. i like you so much and i can't let this just slip away.

Me: i like you too, Ari. but i think we're better off this way.

I went into his message settings, and clicked Block Number without hesitation. I looked at Harper, who seemed to be alright with my decision too.

"I'm sorry." She said again.

"It's okay. But promise me one thing?" I asked.

"Yeah?" She began to pull onto the road.

"We're going to enjoy these last days here. No more thinking about Ari. Also, don't feel bad if you want to leave the hotel or anything to spend time with Sam. I'm all for you guys." I said.

Harper squinted an eye. "Sam is cute but I'm not sure if he's a long-term kinda guy. I'm undecided about him. But you're right, we're going to make this last half of our trip so amazing that we're going to forget the first part. Deal?"

Right... "forget".

"Deal." I said.

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