ok so this is the beginning of something i wrote and gave up on ages ago. it's only about 400 words and nothing actually happens but...
i just thought i'd post it instead of deleting it. i wanna try write and post more, get my account back on track n stuff.
thank you so so much for the support on me coming back! im glad u didn't lose hope after i left again.
for context, the idea was that simon and jj are roommates in university. simon's got the biggest crush on jide, who just got dumped. :)
the moonlight that slips its way into the dorm room turns his skin to silver. his tears glisten like stars. i want to get up and wipe his tears away, to envelop him in a hug and feel the warmth of his skin against mine. but i can't. i stay frozen in place.
i sit cross-legged on my bed, my back against the wall and facing him. jj hugs his knees to his chest as tightly as possible, as if trying to shrink away from the world. i don't blame him. we sit like this on nights that refuse to end. if we both can't sleep we would sit on our beds facing each other from our sides of the room. and talk. and talk. and talk.
right now, we are not talking. i search desperately for words to break the heavy silence - but nothing. just emptiness. every sob that i hear ties a knot in my stomach, getting tighter with each tear that stains his cheeks. there are too many things in this situation that i cannot possibly understand.
"i just didn't see it coming," jj says. his voice is barely a whisper and he sounds uncharacteristically fragile. i frown, chewing the inside of my cheek. "i thought i could love her." this makes me flinch; i can taste a hint of blood in my mouth from biting too hard.
"hey... it's going to be okay. she never deserved you anyway - i mean, she dumped you by text. you can do so much better." he remains quiet. i mean it. anyone who can just throw him away and replace him was never worthy of him in the first place. i wish i could show him just how amazing he is. i don't believe i've ever adored anyone as much as jj.
when jj and lois first got together, i thought that it would be a good thing when they break up. that would he'll be single again i won't have to deal with seeing them together everywhere. she was a constant reminder that my feelings for jj are unrequited. but now i feel like such an asshole for thinking that. there is nothing relieving about seeing jj in tears over someone as pathetic as her.
just the thought of her now makes my fists clench. i think about just how much jj means to me. not only is he my roommate, but he's my best friend. the one person who knows me better than anyone. we've been through so much together, years of school and now, uni.
