Empress Natsume ✓

XXXV

I tried get away from him when I felt his tongue on my neck. He licked the trickling blood on my neck for goodness sake!!

"What the--!!"

His arms tightened around me even more when I tried to get away. He put his hands around my neck again but this time, he was careful, his touches are slow and soft as he traced the blood with his fingers making me shiver. His dark eyes were looking at me with softness in it.

"I didn't meant to hurt you, I just... Just got carried away with my emotions"

Nodding my head, I put my arms on his shoulders and smiled up at him.

"It's okay... It doesn't hurt much, just like a prick of a needle"

"A prick of a needle still stings"

I tug at his hair, making him look up a little

"It's all your fault then"

He smirked at me

"You sure like to tug my hair"

"Cause it's soft"

Lord Ryuu's hair is not that long, it barely passed his neck, it's darker as the night and it's soft. I put my right hand on his head and comb his hair

"Hmmm... that feels relaxing"

He put his head on my shoulder again while still holding me. We keep silent for a few minutes. Sensing his peaceful mood, I decided to break the silence to ask the question that's been killing me for months since the day that I was betrothed to him. I've always wanted an answer from my curiosity or I'll turn mad if it's left unanswered.

"Milord, how did you exactly turn into a..."

"Monster?"

He offered and I didn't said anything or nod at that word. Sure, he's a ruthless warlord, a man that massacred his own family with his own hands, a man that can kill anyone. Despite of knowing all these facts, I still feel a surge of affection towards him. The way his eyes look at me with softness in it, the way he treated me with care (of course, the event that happened a while ago is excluded) fine, he can be pretty harsh and rough sometimes to me but at the end of the day, he'll apologize. I recalled the time when he first call me to his quarters and was struck by his hand for the first time.

That's also the reason why we became close to each other after I apologize to him. I came to adore his mood swings too, one moment his mad and then laugh at the next moment. Perhaps it was because of this very reason that I came to know him that I don't feel threatened at his presence when I used to shake like a leaf and have a cold sweat in fear when I'm in front of him but now... It feels like it was nothing. I even used to think that it will be better if he's always away from home and I will never worry about him, because I'm more worried about mysew when he's around and my heart cannot rest in ease because of the fear he has befallen to it. Now... I worried about him, I care about him more than I expected.

I put my hand on his head that is resting on my shoulder

"You're no monster, you're just cursed" I felt his mouth curved into a smile on my neck as he snuggled closer to it and breath deeply, inhaling my scent.

"You smelled like a lavender while I always smell of stinking blood and metal"

Is he trying to change the subject?

"I like your earthy smell too when you didn't freshly came out of war"

Is my question going to be remain unanswered again? I shouldn't force him to say it if he doesn't want me to know. As if hearing my thought, he started to talk about it.

"It's a very long story you know?"

"I'am willing to sit here all night and listen"

He breath deeply again before he decided to speak.

"I was the heir and the next head of our noble clan. My family always has a high expectations of me and I met all of their expectations because I've work hard for it. To live to their expectations became my habit, I became the almost perfect boy and the apple of their eyes, dimming all of my cousins and siblings, but not a single one of them tried to plot against me. They admired me and would follow me wherever I go that it's starting to annoy me. I constantly received compliments from my clan and the other people, but then... When I turned twelve years old, there was a disturbing prophecy that was given to me by an oracle. She said that I won't live longer than fifteen years old, my clan didn't believe her because we don't have the same beliefs and religion. They didn't let it disturb them and just focus in strengthening our power and flourishing our owned city states, while I continued on my trainings.

At a young age, I headed to war and lead our army to defend against the invading forces in our territory, I succeeded and my clan was proud of me, I even surpassed their expectations. At the age of fifteen... My body became physically weak and I have fallen ill for a long time, it was an incurable disease. I was slowly dying, it feels like I was thread away from death. That's when they remember the oracle who foretold the prophecy about me.

They send for tens and thousands of soldiers in search for the oracle. Four days after, they found her at the coast of Eastern Sang, but it was too late, my soul had already left my body three days ago. I can still remember it, the pain that I've felt while my soul is slowly departing out of my body, painful is an understatement. My death was mourned by our whole clan and the citizens of our city states.

The oracle though has another way to bring back the dead. She told them that it's dangerous and there will be a lot of consequences. My clan was desperate to respawn me, to see their perfect young Lord again on his feet, so they did what the oracle has told them. To perform a forbidden and sacred ceremony for a demon and offer their blood in exchange for my soul, they call a priestess to perform a ritual dance, they cut their palms and let their blood drip to a large pot until it was filled, they also use their blood to draw a wide five pointed star in a circle on the ground. What they didn't know was that it wasn't enough to satisfy the demon. Still, it was enough to summon forth a demon, and it was me, a demon soul replaced my long lost soul in my body. I woke up with bloodlust but I was pretty conscious that time, my senses are all clear, yet I was thirsty. It was me but at the same time it wasn't.

My clan rejoiced when they saw me move. The moment my mother came near me with tears of joy in her eyes, I killed her with my bare hands. My appearance that time was different, I have a black veins all over my body, my eyes were red and the whiteness of it were black, my hands has a long and sharp black nails. I became a monster and kill everyone in that ceremony. I round our house and kill anyone that I saw"

He paused and snuggled closer to me, clinging to me like he's clinging to his own life

"I've calmed down after I didn't feel any human presence and you know what was worse?"

His shoulder shook, not because he's crying, he's laughing.

"I don't feel a little bit of remorse because it feels right, it feels right to kill all of the people there, they've sacrificed themselves to me and offer their blood. My brutality didn't stop there, I killed Kana when we're left alone at the garden, my betrothed. She was a year younger than me, I killed her too because I just feel like it, I've killed another one of my relatives that wasn't present in the ceremony after Kana, then another and another one, my bloodlust has no end, until... I met a girl at the river"

"And who's this girl?"

I'am pretty sure that it wasn't me. I never met him before I was married to him, only once and that was the first time I saw him. The one he's talking about is another girl.

"She has a long, straight, and tangled messy black hair. She's around twelve when I first met her"

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