Introduction

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I slowly walked down the nasty stairs of the apartment building, holding my belly. I was 8 months, but it looked and felt like I was 10.

I hate living in the south side projects because niggas around here were ruthless, but once upon a time I was right along with them. I been living here since I was about 10 but,I've been living on the south side since birth.

My mom left me and my brother Ma'kai to go get it ourselves, teach ourselves,protect ourselves she left us to do her job. When she had our little brother A'mir and then our little sister Bella we automatically knew what we had to do: survive.

At the age of 14 I first started being with the shit and hanging in the hood,I wanted to destroy it, get rich from it, tear it apart, destroy it how it destroyed me, made sure that bitch knew who i was and my purpose. The hood took my mom10 years ago and never gave her back. I could say fuck her. I could say that, but until this day I go outside every day at the same time she told me "I'll be right back so we can go get ice cream." I learned when you love the pipe, that high and the hood more than your own children its nothing that can be done. I stopped considering her as a mother because a mother would never put her child through what she put me through. Ever.

Today was an regular day, walking to school and in my thoughts. I thought about where could she be and why we haven't seen her in 3 years? How she could leave her children and not care? Why I needed her so much? A person who has never needed me. I didn't start needing her until I started getting tired,This was my last year of school, I was graduating early and was walking the stage in August, Having my baby soon, but still at point A when I've did everything to get to point E.

"Hey, T."I said out of breath.

"Are you okay, love?"she asked loudly.

"Yeah, I'm just having a little pain in my lower stomach might be braxton hicks. I'm fine."I lied.

I hope it wasn't time for my baby girl to come yet. I told Tianna I'll see her in homeroom and that I had to go pee, but really I was scared and couldnt let her see it. As I was walking to the bathroom I saw my baby daddy girlfriend Britt.

"Wifey walking through."she yelled, flipping her long weave.

I laughed at her because she was so childish little did she know nobody wanted her nigga she always use that line"I took your nigga."and I always say "bitch I can take your life so what are you getting at?" It was as simple as that. I watched her walk away until she exited the hallway.

"Dear God, I know I got myself into this and I know I have to get myself out of this, but I'm not ready."I prayed softly."I just need time I know she's ready but I'm not. Please god."I begged walking out the bathroom.

I wobbled to homeroom and saw that it was packed. Tianna always had us some cool seats in the back. She waved me over and so did all the niggas.

"Ka'i? why you always got a attitude?"Black asked as I was sitting down.

"Why you always broke?"I asked softly."Why are you 20 in the 12th grade?"I asked."Who are you and why are you talking to me?"I asked.

"Bit-"He started off, but he thought about it."Give me a reason please."I said softly waiting for him to give me a reason to get his ass killed.

A/N: EDITED VERSION.

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