Little Angel [Zayn centric]

9.0

After a lengthy and refreshing shower, Zayn happily went into his daddy's bedroom for pajamas.

He chose a pair of Harry's pajama pants and an old shirt of Harry's, breathing in the smell of both before putting them on.

They were just a little too big, but Zayn loved it regardless.

He stood in front of the mirror messing with his wet hair and smiling at himself when he noticed Harry appear in the doorway across the bedroom.

Zayn turned, smiling some more. "I'm sorry I'm pretty sure I used all the hot water."

"I know you did, it's alright." Harry said quietly, and calmly.

"Let's go to bed." He added.

As Zayn walked towards the bed, he noticed Harry raise his hand to stop him.

"The left side is daddy's." He said gently.

"Okay." Zayn said casually, going around to the other side.

The two got in bed together, and Harry dimmed the lights rather than turning them off, wanting to see Zayn's face.

"Let's talk." Harry said.

"About what?" Zayn asked with a slight frown, laying his head down after turning onto his side to face his daddy.

"I need you to be completely honest with me. I just...I need it okay?" Harry asked, his voice beginning to shake again.

He was propped up on one arm, the lower half of that arm hidden beneath his pillow.

"Okay." Zayn said cautiously, staring at him.

"Do you feel...aren't you the least bit.....I-I mean are you sad at all?" Harry struggled to ask.

"Why would I be?" Zayn smiled, giving Harry goosebumps.

"Because of the murders, Zayn. You took their lives. Innocent lives." Harry said, tears in his eyes again.

"No." Zayn replied, a rather blank expression on his face.

"You must be. Don't lie to me." Harry said, hoping for at least a hint of normality.

"I'm not lying. I have what I've always wanted and I fought for it. I don't see anything wrong with that." Zayn said.

Harry swallowed, blinking his tears away and sighing shakily. "Alright."

"But..." Zayn trailed off, making Harry look at him again.

"I feel sad because you're crying."

"Well I can't help it. Don't feel sad, I'm just really emotional." Harry partially lied, mainly wanting to keep Zayn calm.

"I know but it hurts me." Zayn admitted, making Harry's chest ache even worse.

"I get it." He managed to say, avoiding Zayn's eyes and trying to get himself together.

"What else did you want to talk about daddy?" Zayn asked softly.

Harry took a deep breath, letting it out slowly.

"Nothing. I just..." He trailed off, forcing himself to make eye contact.

"I just want you to know that...I'm sorry if I ever made you feel unloved in any way. I want you to know that I do love you, Zayn. I've loved you since the first time I saw you, and held you. Since the first time you looked up at me with those eyes and grabbed my thumb with your little fist. I've always had so much love for you." Harry told him, tears running down his face the whole time.

"You've always been special to me, and you've always meant the world to me. I want you to know that and always remember that, okay?"

"Of course." Zayn barely whispered, tears in his eyes now as well.

"It-It will be just me and you now okay? You don't have to hurt anyone else or feel hurt anymore. No more anger, or hate." Harry said, softening his tone now and reaching out to touch Zayn's face.

Zayn immediately moved closer and Harry wrapped his free arm around him, gently stroking his hair.

"I've got you now okay? Just me and you." He said, able to feel Zayn's body shaking as he cried.

"Just me and my Zayn forever." Harry said shakily, tightening his grip on the gun he had beneath his pillow.

"Do you promise?" Zayn asked, suddenly leaning back and looking at him.

Harry wished he hadn't done that.

Seeing Zayn's big teary eyes weren't making this any easier.

Harry swallowed, nodding. "I promise."

"I know you're tired, we both need rest. Let's go to sleep now and when we wake up I'll cook you whatever you want okay?" Harry asked, wiping his tears away.

"And we can spend the day together doing anything you want." He added.

"Okay." Zayn said, smiling just a bit.

"Good." Harry said.

"Will you hold me now? Until I fall asleep?" Zayn asked.

"Of course." Harry said, reluctantly letting the gun go and using both arms to hold Zayn, laying down with him.

He hoped Zayn couldn't hear how quickly and hard his heart was beating.

"I love you daddy." Zayn mumbled, his head buried in Harry's chest.

"I love you too." Harry said, staring at the bedside table.

He was thankful Zayn didn't complain about the fact that the lights weren't all the way off.

Harry was completely stiff for over an hour, waiting patiently for Zayn to fall asleep.

When he was certain Zayn was out, he slowly and gently rolled him onto his back and let him go.

Harry slipped out of bed and grabbed the gun, aiming it and resting his finger on the trigger.

He should've pulled it immediately, he knew he should have.

But instead he began to tremble with emotion, constantly having to blink his eyes clear of tears.

Zayn looked so peaceful and innocent like this, Harry was absolutely wrecked inside.

His skin felt like it was on fire, he was struggling to breathe and his thoughts were suddenly so loud.

Harry swallowed hard, readjusting his grip and his stance.

He released a shaky breath.

"I love you Zayn." He whispered before he pulled the trigger.

His adrenaline surged seconds after and he fired a second time, then a third.

Harry fired until there were no more bullets left, screaming and crying his eyes out the entire time.

He dropped to the floor when it was done, fighting to breathe.

He dug his nails into the floor, his entire body shaking.

Harry was far from being stable, but deep deep down he did know one thing.

It was finally over.

The End

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A/N: As I finished this book, I of course began to doubt myself. I was thinking the ending wasn't good enough, mainly because I really used to love writing this book and now....I struggle to finish it. But, some of the best books have the worst endings in my opinion, so having said that, thank you so much for reading this story, thank you for your nice comments, and your patience. Hope you enjoyed :)
- Z

P.s. - In case you were wondering, Ed ends up getting caught and sent back to the hospital, while Harry moves to a completely different country in an attempt at a fresh start, which he eventually achieves.