15: Dust in the Wind

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"I can't believe you're really staying the night," Andi says as they lay beside each other on her bed.

She keeps throwing popcorn into her mouth, trying to catch it, only to have it land in Stan's face. The third time she does it, he catches it in his own mouth, earning a cheer of approval from her.

"Me too," he agrees, chewing the popcorn with a small laugh.

"How's your Torah reading going?" She randomly asks.

She could tell he'd been stressing about it from what he said the other day when the losers were all sat in her living room. His dad honestly sounds like a prick. A prick who cares too much, but at least cares.

But, you know that sorta of over-caring-ness that completely defeats the purpose? Yeah, like that.

"Honestly, it's going pretty terrible," he admits with a disappointed look. "It's like I've been wasting my entire childhood preparing for this, and when it's done, it won't really mean anything to me personally at all. Plus, when it comes down to it, I literally suck at it. They expect so much from the "Rabbi's son". That's all I am to people."

"You're more than that to me," she reminds. "And to our friends."

Reaching over, Andi flicks on her radio.

"Dust in the Wind," by Kansas, sounds through the room. It seems to have just begun, the guitar rhythm setting the mood.

"It's weird how true this song is," Andi hums. "All we are is dust in the wind, basically."

"What do you mean?" Stan hums, turning on his side to examine her.

She stares up at the ceiling, appearing to be in deep thought. Stan admires the way her eyes look glazed over, like they could tell a million stories, and he'd sit around and listen to them forever.

"Sometimes, it feels like no matter what you do, it doesn't really matter," she elaborates in a soft voice.

He moves to stare up at the ceiling with her, scooting a bit closer to her.

"I think you're right, but I also think you're wrong," he replies. "Everything you do matters to someone, and if it matters to one person— it matters to everyone. Like a domino effect, you know?"

"Wow," Andi nods, "that's so true. Where'd you come up with that?"

"Don't know," he admits. "Everything is strange. Life. People. I think about the meaning of life more than anyone knows. "

"You know, your life is important. You know that, right?" Andi whispers, thinking about what's supposed to happen in the future.

Laying here reminds her of how she can't let him let himself down.

"Do you ever think about the future?" He changes the topic, suddenly looking intrigued.

How ironic that he asks that.

"Yeah," she whispers. "Way more than you think."

There's a comfortable silence in the air as the song continues to play. Stan moves his hand to lace with Andi's, blushing ever so slightly.

"Am I in yours?" He whispers. "Am I in your future?"

She almost wants to cry. Man, if only he knew.

"Baby," she chuckles, "you are it."

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