Days Like This

Control

Control (GeneralFic/EatingDisorder!Kurt)

( Italic, is the voice. Bold, is Kurt )

Kurt wiped away the tears that were streaming down his face quickly, as he looked into the tall mirror. His blue eyes seemed to be clouded over with a misty grey, and slowly, it was consuming all of that bright, happy blue. 

Just like the darkness, was consuming every single piece of his heart.

Like every single word, insult, thing, was eating away at his mind.

You're fat, Kurt. 

He looked up, biting his lip, trying to push that one away, but it just wouldn't go away. So he peered down at his stomach, as he turned around to see a side view of himself. 

From any other person's view, he might've looked perfectly fine. Maybe, a bit skinnier than the usual guy actually, but in Kurt's eyes... fat.

You need to really go on a diet... Lose all that fat.

New tears began to form in his eyes again, and his hands went right up, trying to dry his face once more. Thing was, everytime he tried to do that, the thoughts and simply everything, they just came back into his brain, pushing harder and harder to make him believe it.

He'd been starting to believe them, starting when he was 12.

His mom and dad personally thought it was just some baby fat that hadn't left, and they told him themselves, it'd start to go away. But, when it didn't, those three words began to hit him, and from his own parent's mouthes too.

Well, not his parents... They had died.

Perhaps that's another reason he was so weak, and so vulnerable.

"Kurt?" The boyish voice calmly said, from behind his bedroom door.

Kurt quietly gasped, immediately turning his head to face the door knob, which was beginning to turn. He speedily went and grabbed his shirt, tugging it onto his body as soon as he could. He didn't want anyone to see his ugly body, and it wasn't just the fat he wanted to hide.

There were scars too.

"Hey.." Blaine softly said, as he slowly walked into the messy room.

Kurt lifted his head after he wiped his eyes again, staring directly at Blaine who was wearing a warm smile on his face. Blaine closed the door behind him, and then came closer to him.

"Your mom said I could come up, so.." Blaine explained, as his hand nervously scratched the back of his neck.

"Oh." Kurt simply said, nodding, glancing down as he pushed his long sleeves to cover his wrists more.

"Well, you weren't at school today.. Or yesterday. Or the day before that, actually, none of this week.." Blaine began, sighing, "Where have you been, Kurt?"

Kurt bit his lip in anxiousness, looking right back at Blaine again, "I don't know... Here, I guess."

"Here? Then, why miss school?" Blaine asked him, confusedly looking at him.

"Personal reasons, I'd rather not tell you about, I mean, I barely know you.." Kurt mumbled as he swallowed hard, and wiped a tear that'd been starting to make it's way down his face.

Blaine frowned, clearly noticing the tear, and it wasn't just that, that he'd noticed. Soon as he'd walked into the room, and saw Kurt, he had realized that Kurt had been crying. 

His nose and his cheeks, were a slight pink, and his eyes were red, puffy.. Plus, he kept sniffling, and his voice was higher then usual.

"Kurt, if you want to talk to me about anything... I'm here." Blaine tacitly said, coming closer to where Kurt stood.