skinny love

nine

Ruby
8am Saturday
I stared out my bedroom window. I squinted. Everything was white, pure white. Snow laced every roof and every sidewalk and every mailbox in sight. It was early December, my second favorite time of the year. Ads of cheesy hallmark movies on every commercial no matter what channel. Red and green adorns every store display. Christmas music on every radio station. I don't know about you but I'm all about the Christmas vibe.
"Damn it!" I heard my mother yell as the smoke detector went off.
I jumped out of bed, in leggings and an oversized flannel with my curly hair tied up in a bun. I ran downstairs into a cloud of smoke.
"Mom? What happened?" I found my way to the kitchen.
"Well I burnt the ginger man cookies!" My mom dropped the pan of cookies on the stove and shook her head
I giggled as I looked at the cookies, black as night.
"Now what? These are you dads favorite and I promised him that he would come home to handmade ginger man cookies. And after 25 years of marriage he still doesn't know I've served store bought cookies." My mom shook her head.
"Well why didn't you just buy them this time too?" I asked
"I thought I'd try and make them. But clearly I was not blessed with the talent of baking."
"Well let's just make another batch." I shrugged
"I'm out of flour and sugar. And butter and eggs."
"Okay I'll just run to the store and get cookies." I laughed and went upstairs to grab my purse.
I put on my knee high boots and buttoned up my flannel coat.
I began my walk to the store.

___________
Jimmy
People only tell you what you want to hear. I ask about love and they tell me it's great and you're always happy and you're life is full. They don't tell me about being jealous and getting mad and broken bottles and red eyes. I ask them about life. They tell me not to worry. They didn't say that life's hard and that all I do is worry. They didn't tell me you would hate yourself. They didn't tell me school would make you numb and make you careless. I ask them about death. They tell me that it's the circle of life. They didn't tell me I'd wish for it to swallow me.
I looked up from my notebook. I swallowed hard and tore the page out, folded it and stuffed it in the pocket of my shirt. I laced up my doc martens and looked out the window. I walked downstairs and opened the fridge and grabbed a bottle of beer. I opened it and took a swig and went outside and walked towards the frozen lake. As I walked, I thought.
Life was bad before but it was worse now. Ever since I yelled at Ruby, I hated myself. I despised myself. How could I treat someone like that.
Snow crunched under my shoes.
All I could think about was Ruby, how innocent she was. All she wanted to do was help.
I walked into the frozen lake and into the middle. I chugged the rest of the beer, unfolded my note and set it on and ground, under the empty bottle.
Tears welled in my eyes. I stomped on the ground with all the force in me. I punched the ice so hard my knuckles bled. All the anger I had stored up in me came out and it was unstoppable. The ice started to chip and crack under me.
From the corner of my eye I saw a girl walking on the side walk I kept pounding away and I wiped my eyes to see who it was. Ruby.

_______________
Ruby
As I was walking I caught sight of someone smashing their fists against the ground. As I got closer they looked familiar. I squinted my eyes, I stopped walking. As soon as I noticed what they were trying to do I ran out into the lake.
"HEY STOP!" I yelled. They ice was slippery so I walked as fast as I could.
They looked up at me with teary eyes.
"Wait....Jimmy? No NO! JIMMY STOP!" I ran, as fast as I could. He kept pounding, weaker this time, sobbing.
"JIMMY STOP!"
He stood up and turned towards me.
"Don't come any closer, Ruby!" He helped a hand up.
Tears filled my eyes
"Stop it!" I slowed my pace but kept walking
"Ruby please! You'll fall in. Stop."
"I'm not gonna loose you liked this Jimmy!" I kept walking
"I can take it anymore. I'm an idiot. I deserve this."
"No you don't Jimmy! Break the chain! You don't have to be like him!" He knew who I was talking about and he shook his head and looked down. He raised his foot and slammed it down.
"NO!" I let out a scream and I ran towards him. The ice under him was breaking. He looked up at me.
They world slowed.
I was 6 feet from him. The ice was cracking under my feet. I looked down as it flashed and I was seeing water.
I heard a scream and felt so much force it knocked me out cold.
Then everything went black.