Realization

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Jack's P.O.V

He left me. Why? Because of some stupid fucking wedding jitters. He thinks he's not good enough for me. Why? Because he's spent his entire life being told he was worthless. But I need to find him. I went in my contacts and hesitantly clicked on his name.

Ring.

Ring.

Ri-

"Why are you calling me?" Mark asked. His voice, again broken. Broken by the pressure of society. By the pressure of me.

"Mark, we need to talk. Can you come back?" I asked. Well, it was more of a plead, but no need for specifics. I heard crying on the other line. Why hasn't he told me how he felt?

"You don't understand, Jack. I don't want to hurt you. I hurt everything I touch. I'm sorry, but I can't go through with the wedding. Or with us. Goodb-"

"STOP IT! You've spent your life being told that you weren't good enough. That you were worthless. I'm trying my best Mark. I'm trying to treat you like a fucking king. But you won't accept my love or my appreciation. Why? I don't understand. Why can't you just accept that I love you and that we're meant to be together?" I asked. There was a pause of silence.

"I'm afraid, Jack. Afraid not just of marriage. But about how we're just born to die. How easily you can fall in love just to fall out of it the next. How easily you can go from popular to lame just because you're an outsider. You have problems, but I have more, Jack. I have problems you can't even begin to understand. And I don't want to hurt you with them. I love you. I'll always love you. But I can't pretend like I'm okay anymore. I'm falling, Jack. And I don't want to bring you down with me. Find someone else. Someone who deserves you. I love you, Jack. But our story, is at an end. I'll cancel the wedding. Goodbye."

Silence fell on me as the haunting monotone sound of death was emitted from my phone. I can't move. I try to walk, but my feet won't budge. My knees give out and I fall to the floor. The one who I was supposed to be with forever abandoned me for fear I would abandon him. How ironic. 

My love wasn't enough. The therapist wasn't enough. He needed my advice, not a strangers advice. He needed all of me. And I only gave him half. It is a sad day today. Two hearts break because of one depressed person. 

The person I loved so much that it broke him

__________________________________________

Stay strong, and remember, you are loved

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