When We Crashed

I'm Sorry

Luke's pov:

"And you did what?!" Julie screams at me as she takes in everything I just told her.

After I dropped Ella off, I ended up driving straight to Julie's house.

When I arrived, at first she got mad at me for waking her up from her 'nap', but knowing her, it consisted of sleeping about eight to ten hours so I can't really call it that.

But after she really looked at me, she immediately let me in.

I knew I had to come to her because one, she is one of my closest friends, and two, she always helps people.

"I know, I know, I couldn't help myself okay?"

She takes a deep breath and sits next to me on her couch, "Luke, you know I love you like a brother but you can't let your anger take over. You have to think about others first. Like the baby she was holding, or even Ella, you put her in a tough position." She says calmly.

Feeling the guilt, I rest my head in my hands.

"God I am such an asshole."

"You're not a... that word.. you're just..... uhm..." I can hear the gears turning in her head.

"It's okay Julie, I get what you're trying to say." But instead of seeing a usual smile on her face, she frowns instead.

Which makes me feel even worse.

Julie is just always happy and cheerful...

Ashton will kill me if he finds out I made her upset.

"No Luke you don't get it, you can't be so hard on yourself, you were just hurt."

"Ella probably hates my guts."

At this, Julie immediately pipes up, "Luke, Ella is like one of the nicest people I know, if anything, she was probably just confused."

But I just shake my head at her words.

Why am I such a screw up?

Everytime things start to go good in my life, I always find a way to mess it up.

"Maybe Ella is just better off without me and my messed up life."

But before I could react, I feel a slap to the back of my head, "Ow!! What was that for??!"

"For coming up with that hideous idea!"

"What are you talking about." I complain scratching the back of my head.

"Ella adores you, you literally went out of your way to help her see what it's like not being trapped in her house, yes we had an amazing girl talk by the way, but don't give up on her." Julie says giving me a side hug.

Her words linger in my mind as I almost force myself to look at the ground and not up at her.

Why?

Because I was just ashamed.

"I am such an-..."

"I'm sorry but say that swear word one more time and I will slap you... again."

I smile and look up at Julie to see the ends of her lips pulled up in a small grin.

Even with her... threatening words... I know that she is there for me.

That is what's best about Julie.

After knowing her for so long, she is basically my sister.

I mean, growing up with four older brothers it was weird at first, but overtime, it's almost a relief knowing that she has my back.

"So, What should I do?"

"Well one, you have to let Ella know that you're not upset with her. I mean if I was in her situation, I would somehow think you were upset with me, and two..." she stops suddenly and looks down at the ground, trying to not meet my eyes.

"And two?" I ask cautiously as she looks back up at me.

But Julie just takes a deep breath, "I think you should... talk to Samantha."

"What?!" I jump off the couch and stare at her as she calmly looks up at me from her place on the couch.

"Luke, you have been hurting ever since it has happened and it's been almost a year! Please, you don't have to forgive her, just talk to her. Ask her why it happened, Luke I promise you it will help, just trust me."

"Are you serious Julie? It's almost like you are on the same side as her!"

"Luke I am not taking sides, I just... want what's best for you."

"And talking to the person who hurt me will help me?" I almost laugh, but I was to angry to let the noise leave my throat.

Instead, I pushed it down along with my guilt and pity.

I hated being upset with Julie, but I couldn't help it.

Until, the dots connected in my head.

"Wait... did... did you know she was pregnant?" My voice cracks.

I watch as a look of pain crosses Julie face.

She slowly stands up, "Luke I am sorry, I wanted to tell you so badly... I was just scared, I didn't want to hurt you anymore then you already were-..."

"I knew for some reason you kept in contact with her, but I trusted you!"

"And you can still trust me Luke!"

But I only shake my head and take a step back, "I would have trusted you if you would have just told me the truth, instead I had to find out almost a year later."

I start to see tears gather in Julie's eyes, but I quickly look away and walk to her front door.

"Luke! Please don't leave." She starts to beg but I force myself to open the front door.

It was a mistake to come here.

I feel like a fool.

Julie grabs my hand, "You're right! I made a mistake! I should have told you, i'm sorry, I'm so sorry. Luke please don't be mad." Julie cries as I pull my hand out of her grasp and walk out her front door, making a straight dash to my car.

I hear her footsteps behind me as I look anywhere but her face as I pull out my keys from my pocket.

From there, I get in my car and pull out, hearing her last words whisper, "I'm sorry."

Why do I have to make myself so emotional while writing these kind of things?

Without trying to cry, I hope you guys, well, kinda liked this chapter.

It was very sad to write, believe it or not.

I love you guys!

~juls