When We Crashed

Because Of Him

Ella's pov:

I don't say anything as Luke takes a seat on the couch across from where I was sitting.

What should I say?

What could I say?

Nothing was running through my head except anger, hurt, and betrayal.

Sitting there, I couldn't even bring myself to make eye contact with him.

"Ella.... I am so sorry for everything." Luke's voice speaks up.

I sit there in silence as I stare down at the floor.

Is that what his voice sounds like?

It's only been a week and yet it felt so different to hear.

But his voice has been in my head all week, it couldn't possibly be the answer.

Could it?

"I swear on my everything, I never meant to hurt you, I am so sorry."

I find it in myself to look up and see his eyes watching my every move, like if I even attempted to walk away, he would already be ready to catch me.

So many times I thought about what I would say if Luke, well ever, tried to talk to me again.

But now that I am here, I can't even think of one thing to say.

All I could think of was him telling me how he would never leave me.

...

He did.

Without a warning or anything.

Him apologizing isn't the part that hurts... its the fact... that I don't know if I can even feel like his sorry matters.

Did I matter to him when he made that promise?

Did I matter to him when he left me in the park?

Did I matter to him when he ignored me for a week?

"I should have never left you alone in the park, and I shouldn't have pushed you away." His voice was soft, almost angelic.

But why did I feel like I was being stabbed repeatedly by every word that left his mouth?

His voice used to fill my heart with joy, made me feel full.

Now, his voice just fills my heart with hurt, makes me feel empty.

It's crazy to think how much a person can change your life.

One day, they can make you feel like the luckiest person on the planet.

And the next... you just feel like the gum on the bottom of their shoe.

I felt my hair fall to the side of my face as I try my best to focus on the comfort of the couch, instead of the sadness in my chest.

"Please Ella, say something." Luke's voice almost begs.

It takes me a second to put thoughts into words.

"What do you want me to say? That I am okay? That I am happy that you have come to see me after a week? Well thanks for stopping by." I say frustrated.

I hated being put in this position.

The fact that as much as I would like to hit him in the face with the lamp that's temptingly very close....

I also want to just run up to him and hug him.

But, that's when I realize how much of an asshole he has been and I think back to option one.