So Cruel, yet so Beautiful. [ON HOLD]

Chapter 5 - Control

*Alexandra*

I ran out the cell, locking it behind me. My heart was racing and I was breathing faster than normally. I walked down the hallway trying to keep my posture upright, keeping a straight face not showing my emotions. I finally made it to the front of the prison and as I walked past the guards they all bowed their heads in respect. I gave them a fast nod and walked past.

When I made it outside I took a deep breath and started running to my house. I ran past pack members ,they all had worried expressions on their faces seeing their alpha running full speed toward her house.

I made it home and walked in through the gates. I opened the door and went in then I heard Avery call from the kitchen,

"You're home early. What's up?"

I shortly replied,"Nothing."

She poked her head out the door looking at me. Her blonde hair braided like mine and a few strands hanging around her face. Her emerald green eyes stared directly at me.

"Okay. Anyway I went to Lisa today, she says she misses you. She wants you to visit her more," she said walking out the kitchen throwing a green apple in the air and catching it again.

"She knows I don't have time to myself anymore. Being an alpha isn't easy, especially when you're as young as me," I said making my way to my study to which Avery followed me.

She then says," That is no excuse,she really needs you. You can make time because you are the alpha, the pack must obey your decisions."

"Alright, I do it tomorrow. I just need to handle something urgent about one of the prisoners," I said then her eyes widened.

"A new prisoner? I've been waiting for a new fighting match. When can I meet him, I was actually planning on going to the prison this afternoon anyway," she said with a smile but I growled at her.

"Don't you fucking dare go to the prison this afternoon and if you do I'll punish you for disobeying me," I said and she whimpered at my harsh tone.

I snapped out of my nature when I heard her say," Why are you reacting like that? You know I wouldn't do anything like that except if you give me permission."

"I don't know why I reacted like that, it just came out. I know you wouldn't do anything like that, I'm sorry."

She gave me a shocked look and said," You just apologised... to me. I don't know what's going on with you but you better figure it out because I need the old Alexandra."

She then walked out of my study and closed the door. That made me angry so I picked up the vase with flowers and threw it across the the room against the wall where it shattered. I opened a drawer in my desk and took out silver knife and told my wolf,

"I going to give you control but then you listen to my every command, is that clear?"

"Yes,Alexandra," she said and I gave her control of my body. When she had control I gave her the first command.

"Take the knife and make a cut on both arms," Electra whimpered at the command but did it anyway.

"Good, now give me control," I commanded her. At first she hesitated but I made her give it.

The wounds have already healed but I couldn't give her off that easily for hurting Avery. So I took a silver chain andstrapped it around my arm, the burning was awful but I bared through it. I hid the chain by pulling a hoodie on.

I deserve this pain,she deserves this pain for hurting Avery. Avery is one of my most precious gifts, she is my life. She is my daughter or more accurate I'm her adoptive parent. I hate myself after every time I upset her in anyway possible. So I have to cause myself pain.