So Cruel, yet so Beautiful. [ON HOLD]

Chapter 20 - I Love You

"And he'll race for miles through the night. He runs because he knows he cannot hide."

*Alexandra*

I woke up and sat up straight on the bed, breathing heavily. My mind was racing trying to figure out what was real and what not. After I finally realised I had a nightmare I calmed down and my breathing returned to normal.

I reached over to the nightstand next to the bed to switch on the lamp and get my phone to check the time. The screen of my phone lit up and it showed it was 02:00 am.

There was still a lot of time before Matthew's trial. I breathed a sigh, knowing I won't be able too fall asleep again soon so I got out of bed.

I pulled on a sweater and went downstairs. I walked past the living room where Conrad and Raymond were fast asleep. Raymond on the couch and Conrad in the armchair.

I snuck past them quietly and went the kitchen to get a glass of water. When I entered I saw that the back door was slightly open. At first I thought someone had broken in, but when I looked outside to the backyard I saw Matthew sitting on the stone bench under the night sky.

He seemed so peaceful, looking up at the sky, a small smile on his lips, the moonlight illuminating his face in the dark.

I opened the door just a little bit more so I could slip out without waking someone. I walked barefoot across the grass towards him. He must've heard me because he turned his head and smiled at me.

I returned his smile and sat next to him, then I asked, "What are you doing up this early?"

"I could ask you the same question," he replied making me chuckle.

"I asked you first," I told him and he sighed.

"Okay. I couldn't sleep so I came out here to pray to the Moon Goddess," he explained and his answer surprised me.

"Why do you still pray to her? She didn't protect your pack from the rogues. She didn't stop me from hurting you. She's taken so much. Why still ask for her help?" I asked him.

He looked away, still smiling and said, "I'm not asking for her help. I'm thanking her."

I gave him a questioning look so he continued, "You see, for everything she's taken, she gave something else in return. She took my old pack, my home, and gave me a new one. She took my family which hurts like hell, but she gave me a new one. If she hadn't done what she had, I would've never met you. And for that I'm thankful."

"Matthew, I sorry for everything we've done to you. This pack just has so much hate for outsiders, I had so much hate for outsiders. It blinded me which led to you getting hurt in the proses. No matter how many times I apologise I could never stop the guilt," I said looking away from him, feeling ashamed.

Then he used his hand and turned my head so I faced him again. His dark green eyes were warm and filled with compassion which I admired. He then said, "Alexandra, don't feel guilty. You had your reasons for hurting me and I understand that. I know you wouldn't hurt me on purpose. You were protecting your pack, I would've done the same in your situation. Just promise me you won't hate yourself. Just promise me that."

I nodded my head, at a loss for words, a man who's lost so much, who's still strong enough to encourage others. I don't deserve to be blessed with such a wonderful mate. Maby the Moon Goddess wasn't as cruel as I had thought.

He leaned forward and pressed his lips to mine. His hand moved down to my waist and I wrapped my arms around his neck. As the kiss deepened he pulled me onto his lap and I ran my hands through his hair. We couldn't get enough, only pulling away to catch our breaths.

Finally after what felt like hours we pulled away from each other. My arms were still around his neck and his hands were on the small of my back as we sat in silence.

A little while later he says softly, "I love you, Alexandra."

Then I say, "I love you, Matthew."

We go in for another kiss, but this one was much softer than the one we shared a while ago. We ended the kiss and he removed his arms from around me allowing me to get off and sit back down next to him.

This time I lay my head on his shoulder and place my hand in his. He kissed my forehead and rubbed his thumb across my knuckles as we sat watching the moon.

We sat there until I started to feel tired so we went back inside, but instead of going to our separate rooms, Matthew came to mine. He had his arms around my waist pulling me to him so my back pressed against his chest.

I was really tired and his coffee and mint scent helped me fall asleep. Before I knew it I was already starting to drift off. The last thing I heard was Matthew saying, "Goodnight, pluvia stilla."

I smiled to myself knowing full well what he had called me so I whispered back, "Goodnight, venator meum."

Just after saying that I completely drifted off, falling asleep with Matthew's arms around me.

♤♤♤

Hey everyone! It's 01:04 here and I should be sleeping but I completed the next chapter instead.

Translations:
Pluvia stilla - Raindrop
Venator meum - My hunter
(Both Alexandra and Matthew can speak Latin.)

Anyway. I hope you liked the chapter please vote, comment and share.

Love you guys♡
Thea