Stay With You (Anthony Rizzo)

9

Maliyah

"When do you come home" I ask into the phone as I lay in bed. It was about 2 in the morning and I couldn't go to sleep. Anthony promised that every time I was restless I can call him and he will talk to me. And every time I called he answered me.

"I come home in 2 days. And the first thing I'm going to do is come and see you" he claims.

"You don't have to do that" I insist. I wanted him to, but I also don't want him spending all his time in the hospital watching over me.

"Well I can't come see you right now so I kind of do" he claims and I smile. 

"You miss me huh" I tease.

"More than I can even explain" he claims. "Am I being too clingy" he asks.

"No. You're the single bright spot I've had in my time being in the hospital. You're kinda like my guardian angel" I claim.

"You think so" he asks.

"Yeah. I forgot what it was like to smile until you came into my life. When I'm around you I can't stop smiling, your mere presence makes me so happy. You always say something that makes my heart skip a beat. Whether it's the one liner compliments or the fact that you never miss a chance to tell me that I'm beautiful. I can't help but want you to be around. And I feel so selfish, I shouldn't be keeping someone like you all to myself. But I haven't had something good happen to me in so long, and you're the best thing that's ever happened to me. I forgot what it was like to actually enjoy living until I was living with you in my life. There's no place I would rather be than sitting rooftop with you looking over the city dreaming about a future where I'm not sick. I forgot what it was like to laugh until you came along. I love when you do something silly just to make me smile. It makes me feel so... good.

You are the best reminder that life is as beautiful as we make it. And you, you make my life like a rare piece of art" I explain.

"I'm glad I can mean something to someone like you. It makes me feel like I matter beyond baseball" he claims. 

"You do. Especially around here. These kids think of you as one of their own. Every time you're here the place lights up, kids want to come out of their rooms just to see you. They can't wait to tell you about their days and you always take the time to listen. There's no one in their mind higher than you" I insist.

"I'm just trying to make a difference in these kids' lives. I want to mean something to them" he insists.

"You do. I promise you're making such a difference" I explain.

"And what do I mean to you" he asks.

"Everything" I admit.

Eventually it gets super late and I decide I should let him go. We reluctantly hang up and I grab my notebook again. I start to sketch in it as I wait for sleep to meet me. Finally at about 5 am I doze off and wake up again at 11. I take my medication and I attend my radiation treatment before my next round of chemo. They were going to up the dosage to try and make up some ground but who knows what will happen next. I learned to not to try to predict the future. That's how you really get hurt. Instead you roll with the punches and hope for the best.

"Hey Mal, how are you feeling today" Tamara asks as she comes in. She checks all my vitals before writing something down.

"I feel like I'm slowly dying" I smirk and she sends me a glare.

"You see, I wanted to work with children so I didn't have to deal with the sick and twisted sense of humor kids my age have" she defends and I laugh.

"I feel fine" I assure her.

"Fine isn't good. Fine is what people say when things are bad but they don't want to admit it" she insists.

"Sounds about right" I agree.

"Of course one of my only friends is sitting around here waiting to keel over. I need to get out more" she insists.

"Have Anthony set you up with one of his buddies" I insist.

"I don't do blind dates" she claims.

"Then wear your glasses" I say and she just glares at me.

"You're the worst. You know that" she asks.

"I have my moments" I shrug.

After she was done dealing with my bull shit she goes off and I turn back to my drawing. I learned that time passes by really slowly when you're stuck in here. I also learned that a great way to relive pain is to draw. So to kill two birds with one stone I keep a drawing pad in my room. I just add to it whenever I can. Usually it's whatever I dream about.

"Watcha drawing" Tamara asks as she comes back into my room. This time with lunch and some things for me to read.

"Wrigley field" I tell her.

"Well that's adorable" she claims

"It's actually turning out pretty good. But I think I've watched more baseball in these two months than I have in the all years before" I insist.

"Didn't one of your brothers play baseball" she asks.

"Timothy did. But he quit after college" I explain.

"Do you even like baseball" she asks.

"I do. I just never had time to obsess over sports because I was so focused on volleyball" I insist.

"Do you miss it" she wonders.

"I haven't done a physical activity in a year. I would kill to just hit a ball right now" I admit.

"We're gonna get you there" she promises.

"How do you know that" I ask.

"You got a lot of good people in your corner. We're gonna get you through this" she insists.

"I would like to get out, even if it's for one day. Go see Anthony play baseball and sit in the bleachers. Drink some beer and cheer on the hometown team" I insist.

"You will. One day."