Miraculous Ladybug Oneshots

Pick-Up Lines

I will warn you now, there is some *clears throat* slightly mature conversation. It's somewhat vague so if you don't know, you won't get what they're talking about.

If you do understand and it makes you even slightly uncomfortable, simply skip over it. This kind of stuff won't appear in this book often.

If you continue, then please enjoy this short Marichat.

And again, it's just some pick-up lines and a few are a bit dirty. It's for humor, I'm not writing sin.

Tread carefully, my smol ones.

*Leans back in chair and sips water, waiting for comments to blow up*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Are you a tidal wave because I want you to drench me in your liquids."

Cat Noir's eyebrows furrowed together as he stared at the laptop in front of him. He was lying on the floor and had his gloved fingers pressed on the computer keys.

He glanced next to him at the bluenette clad in a pink shirt and white shorts. Marinette met his eyes in confusion, her phone in her hand. He watched her face as she gasped and seemed to get the joke, blushing a vivid pink but sniggering into her free hand.

What the heck does that even mean?

...Oh.

Oh.

OH.

Cat Noir felt his cheeks warm, bright and true, and didn't have to find a mirror to know he was beet-red.

God, he was an idiot.

Cat felt his cheeks warm further and pursued his lips as Marinette roared with laughter, clutching her stomach. Her midnight hair framed her face and brushed the floor as she took a few gasping breaths, trying to regain control.

"Okay, that's enough, Princess! Come on, your turn!"

Stifling one last chuckle, she turned on her phone before reading the first sentence she saw. "Are you social anxiety because you haunt my every waking hour."

Cat choked on a laugh, desperately trying to muffle his snickering with his hand so as not to absolutely roar with laughter. Next to him, Marinette turned her face until she could press her mouth against his shoulder, coughing when she was laughing too hard too breathe.

He patted her hair, determined not to look at her. He knew that if he did, he'd end up in a fit of laughter again. Instead, he pulled the laptop back in front of him as Marinette pulled away, taking deep breaths.

"Your dad must be a baker because you've got some nice buns."

Marinette started laughing almost maniacally and he frowned. Why was that so funny?

"Are you high?"

She laughed harder. "Do you not get it?" Marinette rasped out as he glanced at her in confusion before gasping.

The feline hero slapped a hand over his mouth in revelation as the teen next to him cackled at his horror.

That remark was so true.

By that, he meant the baker part. Not that she didn't have some nice buns, because she did, he just-

Oh my god, stop and get your mind out of the gutter!