phan one shots

underwater kisses

Summary: During the summer Dan and Phil go to the pool

TRIGGER WARNINGS: insecurity, anxiety, self deprecation

"Daaaaaaaan?" Phil called walking into the lounge with pleading sapphire puppy dog eyes and cotton candy colored lips in an adorable pout.

Dan, who was sprawled across the couch, looked up from his laptop expectantly, and as soon as he saw Phil's expression, immediately sighed and stared up at the ceiling as though silently asking for strength.

"Phil." He said apprehensively, resisting the urge to bite his nails.

"Can we go to the pool-"

"No."

Phil whined, poking his bottom lip out even more.

"But Dan please! It's summer! And it's a beautiful day out! Plus Louise invited us! It would be rude to decline!"

Dan glanced away, flinching when Phil abruptly kneeled down in front of him, tilting his chin down so he couldn't avoid his gaze, warm touch leaving his skin tingling.

He sighed. "Phil, I-"

Phil leaned in, batting his lashes "innocently."

"Please Dan?" He asked more quietly, making his voice purposefully lower and more breathy.

Dan's throat went dry, and he knew he couldn't say no now, not when Phil was pulling this card, a mixture of his irresistible cuteness and hotness, and begging him.

He knew what he was doing.

And their subscribers thought he was innocent.

Dan exhaled through his nose, running his fingers through his light brown curls.

"Fine." He hesitantly agreed, and Phil jumped up, bouncing on the balls of his feet, and cheered, throwing up his arms and hugging Dan tightly.

"Thank you!" He exclaimed, and Dan couldn't help but smile slightly, dimple denting his cheek as he returned Phil's embrace, breathing in his scent.

"Now go get dressed and meet me down here in 5." He ordered, pulling away and rushing up the staircase into his bedroom.

Dan rolled his eyes, but did so anyway, closing his laptop and walking to his own room, sorting through his trunks.

But when he turned to the mirror, he seriously reconsidered his clothing choices.

On a regular day he felt ugly, and it had taken a lot of confidence and growth for him to be able to wear the kind of clothes he did now, ones that showed his figure.

He didn't like eating on camera, and he definitely did not like swimsuits.

They were basically just waterproof underwear, and they would show off so much of his body.

And as he studied his reflection, his gentle features twisted in disgust and sadness.

He hated his thighs, they were way too wide.

And he was too fat.

It had been a while, but he could still see the darkened scars stretching over his stomach and legs.

And maybe no one else would since they were so faint now, but he still didn't feel comfortable going out and letting everyone see his true, hideous form, especially not his boyfriend, his gorgeous boyfriend who would surely leave him once he realized how ugly he really was.

No.

He decided, no he wouldn't, couldn't let that happen.

So he returned to his closet and picked out something else so wear, sliding his clothes on over it so that Phil couldn't stop him.