Chapter 29 The Garden

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5 months later......

The newly crisp air pushes past my shoulders and through my hair, continuing over my large stomach. It expanded out to prove that another being resides within me. Two souls within one body.

As I sit in the overgrown garden, I look down at the stretched skin, with red and blue lines seeping across the sides.
Once soft skin, now decorated with stripes. My heart bangs loudly against my chest, the tumbling wind tries to overpower all other noise.

The garden seems a shade brighter than of late. It was as if the gift of new life was being revealed to the world to show what was there all along, nature in her in humble brilliance.
The buttercups had become gold, the grass now the shade of every dreamer's meadow, roots quenched, soil renewed.

I watch silently as the workers complete their daily task, waiting for Rebecca to return. She is like my own personal nurse, she keeps track of my nutrition and does all the things I used to be able to do before I got pregnant.

Meanwhile, things in the Sanctuary remain the same. Negan and the rest of the saviors still go on runs, collecting from the other communities.
I've tried to talk to him about being fairer so that one day we can have peace, but he insists that it's the only way he could take care of everyone. I've just come to accept that this is his main philosophy and will probably never change.

"Are you ready for you're afternoon nap?" Rebecca approaches me and holds her hand out.
I look up at her, using my arm to block the sunlight, "I'm fine, I've been having bursts of energy lately". I grab her hand, and she helps me up.

"We should get you inside before something bad happens," she says nervously.
She has been paranoid ever since I passed out a couple of months back.

"I'm tired of being trapped in there all day" I pout tugging on her arm like a child.

"Do you want to walk around a bit then?"

"Yeah, can you take me to Dwight's room?"

She looks at me confused, "Why? Negan said to keep you away from him"

I sigh, "I know, but I need to talk to him".

Negan let him out of his cell a few days ago. He was surprising forgiving but now he has to work for points.

"Fine, but really quick"

I smile and try to throw my arms around her but I only make it half-way because of my swollen tummy.

"Thanks, Rebecca. I promise Negan won't hear anything about this"

~

She hesitantly knocks on the door waiting for a response.

"What!" I hear Dwight's voice yell through the door.

"It's Rebecca and y/n"

Silence falls until the knob twist open.

He stands with a blank look, his eyes shifting between us.

"How it's going Dwighty" I force a smile and try to sound excited.

"How do you think?" his expression turns bitter.

Rebecca interferes warning him of his tone, "Negan wouldn't like you talking to her like that"

He rolls his eyes and sends me a fake smile back, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset my royal highness and her obedient servant!"

"Whatever Dwight! You can't stay mad at me forever you know".

"Watch me!" he slams the door in our face.

"I can see why Negan doesn't want him around you" she turns and gives me the same concerned look she always does.

I shake my head, "he's usually not like that, it's my fault honestly"

I continue down the hallway, Rebecca catches up beside me.

"May I ask why he's so angry with you"

I stop to think before answering her. I don't know if telling her is the right thing to do. We have grown to trust each other but that doesn't mean that I want to spill all my secrets to her.

"We used to be friends until he kept getting jealous of Negan," I tell her half of the truth, telling her the full story would most likely end horribly for me.

~

She hands me a wooden platter as I'm seated in the dining hall. There is a piece of warm bread with a slab of melting yellow butter and a thick, hearty slice of roasted chicken.

I feel no need for pretentious manners, so I grab the meat, ripping a chunk off with my teeth. I eat the food like it is going out of style, cramming it in fast.

The meal had taken about two hours to prepare and cook but is gone in a matter of minutes. "I'm getting so huge," I say ironically wiping the food off my face.

Rebecca laughs and hands me a paper towel, "that's good, it means that the baby is healthy".

I clean myself off and ball up the trash, "hopefully a healthy baby girl".

"That would be cool, she would be like a real-life princess!"

I've always wanted to have a child, especially a little girl. I imagine how fun it would be a have a mini-me. Negan unsurprisingly want a son, he says he wants someone he can train into a 'little serial killer'.

If we weren't in the apocalypse right now, I would think he was insane but since the walkers have taken over being a killer is the only option.

"You betcha! Negan is already very protective, she would definitely be considered royalty"
We both laugh, and she takes the plate from in front of me and returns it to the kitchen.

When she comes back she helps me stand, and we walk back to my room.

"Can you help me get in the bath?" I ask her timidly. I'm not secure in my body but Negan isn't here, and I really need this after being in the garden earlier.

"No problem, that's why I'm here".

We both go into the bathroom, and I take my shirt and bra off as she removes my shoes.
After, she starts to run the water, and I continue getting undressed.

The bathtub is old-fashioned but nice, it perfectly fits Negan's style, it's made of porcelain and clean aside from the small dirt stains on the outside.

The warm water half-way fills the tub and is calling for me.

She guides me as I slide down into the tub, letting it engulf my lower body. I wish it would expand, so I could go swimming like I used to on hot summer Saturdays with my dad and Carl.

She helps me lift my body up, taking careful notice not to put pressure on my aching back, so I can bathe myself.

My mind fades into dullness and everything is foggy. The sensation of the steamy water calms me; it takes my mind off everything I shouldn't have to worry about.

I was in for a while when Negan walks into the steam filling the room, hanging Lucile by his side.
"You ladies having hot shower sex without me?"

Rebecca stands and puts her arms behind her, like a soldier in the military.
"No sir, I was-" he interrupts her and squeezes her shoulder, "Don't be so serious, I know my baby-mama is loyal"

She flashes him a smile then quickly and quietly leaves.

I find it weird that she is still nervous around him, considering she interacts with him every day now.

Normally when Negan catches us in these awkward situations I try to explain things but the feel of the water is too relaxing for me to ruin this moment.

"Ya done yet?"

"Yep" I stick my arms out, and he picks me up bridal style then lays me on the bed with water dripping from my body.

He stands looking over me and licks his lips. "As much as I want to fucking devour you right now, there's something I need to talk to you about"

I lift my head, his sudden change in attitude makes me more attentive. I can't completely read his emotions it's a mix of uncertainty and empathy.

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