CLANDESTINE

vingt - trois

23
_____

tell me why
all the good ones go.
_____

they arrived at their dorm with messy minds.

all the boys were tired, not only that the fan concert was held for three hours, it's been so long since they actually work which made their body wasn't really as responsive as before. not to mention, the sudden attack that shocked all of them.

the boys walked inside the nct 127's dorm to gather for a while, there were a lot they need to take care of. all of them were quick to sat at the couch or the floor, some going to the kitchen for a while, others went to the bathroom and some just waited patiently for other while standing around the living room.

jisung was walking when he saw what would be a small envelope behind the door. he took it silently and walked again, confused as he fumbled the envelope again and again to make out what it might be. it doesn't look suspicious or anything and it was posted with the dorm's address. jisung thought it might just be a normal envelope so he don't put any thought to it. someone must have slided it under the door.

but not everyone knows the dorm's address and that's the point that jisung forgot of.

jisung went beside jungwoo who was close to him at that moment and patted his shoulder to catch his attention. "hyung," jungwoo then looked over and found jisung was holding an envelope. "i got this from there." jisung said while referring to the place that envelope end up at.

jungwoo took the envelope and glanced at the address, it was indeed for them. the others also began to noticed the envelope at jungwoo's hand and questioned him for it which jungwoo said that jisung found it.

taeil stepped forward and just opened the envelope. he found something inside and took it out.

all the boys that were around him gasped.

taeil looked over one by one the papers, his eyebrow furrowing. he can't believe what he just saw. it's same for the other, all eyes were widened and hearts speeding against their rib cage as they saw the content of the envelope.

"what.. " renjun managed to utter and harshly took one of the paper in taeil's hand, he was too shocked to even care that his action may seems disrespectful but it's not like any of them would care at the moment. he studied the paper, his breathing got heavier over time.

taeyong that was with donghyuck behind finally stepped into the dorm and found the boys gathered around one another. mark, who just got back from the bathroom, also looked at the boys that had their eyes set on some papers.

"what is it guys?"

taeyong asked, donghyuck just quietly followed him. the boys flinched at taeyong's voice and turned to him, eyes still wide and mouth gaping a bit. the others also noticed mark coming over.

"u-uh, it's, i don't know what to say-"

discomfort was shown obviously at their face as doyoung answered for them. "what's in your hand?" taeyong asked again, confused at why the boys were acting weirdly.

before any of them get to reply to taeyong's question, jaehyun snatched all the papers and walked to donghyuck. the other boy just furrowed his eyebrow, eyes staring back at jaehyun that was clenching to the papers at his hand tightly.

"w-what is this, hyuck?"

jaehyun put up the papers. at that moment, donghyuck swear his heart literally stop beating for a while.

he stared at the papers- pictures that he tried to forget of- and back to the other boys' faces. their face were unreadable but donghyuck right there already knew they were disappointed of him. he can't even meet jaehyun's eyes that were demanding answer as it bores into him.

"i just, i don't know. we don't know, hyuck. not even one of us."

jaehyun was kind of wrong when he said that.

there were people who knew about them but never said anything. these people saw every secret movements of both of them but never say anything. they knew, if they were to say something, they wouldn't. they knew what would happen if they were to open their mouths regarding the issue. they were same like the two boys, they were scared of everyone's reaction especially the other members.

now that their members somehow found it, they didn't know what to do.

"mark hyung!"

chenle called as mark went forward and took the pictures at jaehyun's hand before ripping it apart. the others were perplexed and no one made a move as they just let mark ripped the pictures to small pieces.

all the happy vibe from before left mark's body and he felt like screaming again as mark saw the tears dripping from donghyuck's eyes. the pain he tried to forced away was back as those tears ran down faster, the others just looking at him.

the other boys didn't know what to feel.

they were shocked but also sympathizing donghyuck at the same time. jaehyun was froze at his state, staring at donghyuck that was crying. he can't believe it, he just made the boy cried. his best friend that he treasure and always tried to protect, was crying because of him. it's his fault that donghyuck was crying and the guilt was eating him alive more than any other.

but jaehyun was wrong. it's not his fault nor anyone.

donghyuck never blame them for seeing it, they would see it anyway, what's the point of pointing fingers? it's never anyone fault. not even mark that tried to protect him. donghyuck always believe that in everything, there must be something that is wrong but he don't know who is it for now. is it him then, for loving mark and living in his fantasy?

jaehyun tried to reason out and explain but mark was already beside donghyuck, glaring slightly at jaehyun.