If Only

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Harry's P.O.V
He was damaged and broken. Maybe beyond repair. But I wasn't going to let him to this soon, even if it took the rest of my- of our lives- I was going to help him through it. He'd been through too much by himself and I think it's about time Draco had a little more help than he thought he needed.

The second his face dropped and his eyes started to fill up, I took the note and read it. When I did, I knew nothing would help. He fainted shortly after and it pained me to see him in this state.

I asked his house elf, Blinky, to help me and quite soon we were back at Hogwarts. Draco was in the hospital wing and I was yet again, in the far too familiar office. I told the truth and McGonagall believed me as well as lectued me. She wasn't happy we did something this reckless but appreciated that we had no idea of what would happen.

The next day, I slipped out of bed before anyone could see me and was beside Draco's bed, from the early hours of the morning to the late afternoon. I slipped classes and one of the elf's bought me some lunch.

It was around 2pm when Draco started to wake up. My hand was on his and he held onto it as he sat up.

"How are you feeling?"

"Like the knight bus ran over me. How long was I out?" He asked. His voice was hoarse and his chest was rising and sinking rapidly but at least he was okay. For now.

"Not long."

"How long have you been here for?"

"Only a few hours." I replied. It wasn't exactly a lie.

"He's been here for almost ten hours." Said someone from outside the curtain. Blinky walked through and smiled mischeviosly at me.

Draco looked at me like he was saying something along the lines of, 'don't lie to me again, Potter' and 'thanks'.

"Blinky, what are you doing here?" Draco asked. I saw the memories flood back into him and with every thought he had, he was becoming physically restless.

"Blinky came with Harry Potter to make sure Master Draco was okay."

"Thank you but I'm fine. You can go back to the Manor."

Blinky nodded and within a few seconds had disappeared. Once again, we were alone. Draco lay down and moved to the far side of his bed, he then patted the free area next to him.

"Sit down."

I moved the covers and sat next to him on the bed. The last time we were here was when Pansy and Blaise were too. But now with just the two of us, there was no need to hide our entwined hands. I lay down too and Draco tuned to face me. His face was so close I could see each of his pale eyelashes and could feel the warmth of his skin.

"How do you do that?" I asked randomly.

"Do what?"

"Pretend you're fine, make everyone believe it."

"I've had a lot of practice," He said quietly, "but it clearly wasn't enough if it didn't fool you."

"Draco, you just found out your mum's dead. You don't have to be okay." I reassured him.

"I don't know any other way. I can't deal with the fact she- that my mother- I can't say it." He admitted.

When he said that, the gravity of the situation become clear. It's also the first time I thought over what the note said. I didn't know Narcissa that well, but I knew that she deserved so much better. I knew Draco deserved so much better.

TW: SUICIDE

~~~Narcissa's Note~~~
Dearest Draco,
By now I will have been missing for a while. I don't know what you've been told but I needed to tell you. I couldn't do it in person yet I know you deserve the truth. I'm not only missing, I will now be dead.

Life As Each Other (Drarry fanfiction)Waar verhalen tot leven komen. Ontdek het nu