The Perfect Boy

Of Love and Friendship

The note is in my hands. I didn't hesitate to open it. I felt different, strength surging from within.

Hi Aspen,

If you read this letter, it means that I have passed on. I didn't want to burden you further with my condition. I was getting worse and whether or not Ben came back into your life, I would still leave. Sorry, I didn't let you know. The times when I was absent from school or was not around you, I was actually being treated for my predicament. I didn't have the heart to let you be with me to the end. You have dealt with so much already. I want you to remember me as when I was still healthy, when I could still give to you what was in me, not one that was rotting away.

I know you will be happy with your life. You will achieve your goals, I know that for certain. And you will throw that mask of yours away and be who you are. I have seen you changed. I am glad that Ben is now by your side to look after you, I know he is very capable of doing it. I know you two will be happy together, if not as a couple, as brothers. I leave Anthony with you. There is chemistry between you two, I know. I treat him as my brother, please do the same.

On this shore of life my ship has arrived, that ship that has my name on it. For so long now, I have been anxious for it to come and let me on. Now, I know that one ship will set anchor soon and it will set sail  and take me to that  far away land where there is no tear or sorrow, no anguish or pain.

I know my departure is imminent, but I want you to know : I am sick, but not sad; I am in pain, but not sorrowful; I am happy as I can be. You should also. I know you will grieve for me. Allow yourself time, but then pick up your dancing shoes. One day your ship will set sail too. But as long as it hasn't, enjoy your time here. I am looking forward to seeing your ship come to me.

I love you always.

Osaka

I sighed, but was actually relieved, truly. I knew the answer to the lingering question I had, and I had all those who cared for me surrounding me, embracing me – Ben, Andrew, Anthony and Connor - yes I was falling, but to the comfort of those who loved me - and for that I was grateful, and yes, I would stand up and pickup my dancing shoes.

Afterwards, we discussed about our plan. Ben and I planned to move to Seattle to go to college there. Anthony planned to join Connor in Spokane to go to Gonzaga. Andrew, my little brother – my buddy - would still be at home to spend the remaining time in school, but he planned to go to Asia after graduation, to be with my grandparents in Jakarta.

We listened to one song before we make haste to leave. The sun was setting after all.

Hyehwadong (Korean song) (translation)

Today, i got a call from an old friend

I've lost touch with for a long time

Saying you'll go very far off tomorrow

You tell me to meet in the alley

Where we played together when we were little

You say you'll go very far off tomorrow

I'm on the jolting subway car to go to the alley

How many things we've lost touch with

while living our lives

When we were little, the narrow alley looks so wide

I see a sweet old friend come to sprint toward me

When we were little,

You suggest to meet the world , full of hope

The one we dreamed about

Saying you'll go very far off tomorrow

Someday, when you come back

Let's we meet with a big smile

Saying you'll go very far off tomorrow

I'm on the jolting subway car to go to the alley

How many things we've lost touch with

while living our lives

When we were little, the narrow alley looks so wide

I see a sweet old friend come to sprint toward me

How many things we've lost touch with

while living our lives

How many things we've lost touch with

while living our lives

How many things we've lost touch with

while living our lives

We drove back to Moscow.  So, this is our life, that of love and friendship.