Even though she tricked me and I hated it,
I had somehow ended up seeing her every day.
The way she moved.
The way she sang.
Even when she looked at me,
She hooked me into wanting her.
Sleeping did nothing but provide me with images of her.
Her...
I woke up in the feeling of warmth. The thing was it was strange this time. I opened my eyes to see Shin causing my eyes to widen. "Shin-kun" He opened his eyes and looked at me.
"Lucy" He chuckled. "You're beautiful even this early." My cheeks darkened.
"How did I-"
"Nee-san left so I decided to comfort you." I quickly got off of him.
"I....I...." After yesterday, I had to remain faithful but...the feeling I had with Shin, I never felt so complete. Looking at his saddened expression pained me, I wanted to make him feel better but the way Carla had been yesterday, he was hurt as well.
Flashback
After I finished singing I looked at the smirking man. "Come" I walked toward him only to feel his lips press against mine. His kiss wasn't the same as before. If anything I could feel the passion and yet for some reason yearning.
It was as if he was asking me something that I couldn't truly understand unless I was in his mind. I backed away and caught my breath. "Carla-kun" He laid on his back and looked at me.
"I hate this feeling."
"Huh?"
"There are times when I visit her and only see you. Each time I do it, it gets worse. What is that supposed to mean?"
"Carla-kun wait-"
"Do you feel this way too?" He looked at me in my eyes. The look he had, it wasn't empty like usual.
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"Because I can't take it anymore and hope you feel that you are happy to accept me as your husband." His words were so sincere and so were his eyes. What was I supposed to do?
Now
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I felt guilty. If only I didn't become so selfish and thought before I did everything, this wouldn't have happened. "Shin-kun" He pressed his lips against mine.
One Month Later
If only I wasn't selfish and thought before I did everything, this wouldn't have happened. I started at a small test in my hand. I should have noticed sooner but I guess I didn't. "So it's positive huh, I am happy." I turned my head to see Shin with a bright smile.
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He didn't know did he, that Carla wanted to try again that one day? There was a fifty percent chance that this baby would be his or Carla's. The thing was that doing this made me feel worse.
If it were Carla's it would hurt Shin and I hated to see that but if it were Shin's, Carla would probably punish the both of us. I knew that he couldn't kill Shin but I was a different story. The thing was the look he had that night...
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It seemed like he actually meant it. Even the things he did for Mao to make sure that she lived a life where she never felt pain, I couldn't help it.
Why was I still in love with him? Through the pain, he caused me through all these years there was something good. In his eyes, even in the night we first met, I saw it. That very night, I couldn't help but long, to see into them again for the rest of my life.
