Chaoter Twenty Four

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I wake up with a pretty big hang over, then walk to the bathroom, and as soon as I get there puke out my guts. I don't really remember anything from last night, expect for just feeling really happy and having a lot of fun. When I'm done in the bathroom, I walk back to my bunk and check my phone, even though I woke up on the couch next to Cc, not there. When I look at my phone I see there's nothing special, so I go to text Vic.

Me:
Hey Vic! I'm in San Diego for our last show. If you wanna come out maybe you can sing with me?

Ping

Mom:
You wanna be gone all the time? Well I don't care anymore, stay in San Diego the rest of your life for all I care. I'm done being worried and trying to get you to spend time with me. I'm tired of your bullshit.

Me:
Okay, I'll be home in a week. I love you, and I'm sorry your mad.

I huff, then put my phone down, and head to the kitchen. I take some Advil out of the cabinet and down it, then make a pop tart and eat it with some orange juice. When I'm done, I wobble back in bed and the next time I wake up my hangover is cured.

I look at my phone again to see Vic gave me a response, and I also see that it's now two

Vic:
If l'd love to! When does it start?

Me:
6:30

I walk back to the bathroom, and Jake comes out of it whipping his mouth, and so I pat him on the back. Then when I get in, I start the shower, and just sit there for a while, trying to wash off the sickness. When I get out, I double French braid my hair back, then leave my face bare, deciding that I'll do it later. Then for the fit, I don't even put on a bra, just a black tank top, and sum sweats with socks.

"Hey" Andy says as I lay down on my bunk, then I look across to see him laying down

"How hung over are you?"

"Pretty fucking"

.
.
.

At the show everyone's not really looking forward to playing, because music is loud and we're all hungover. We play anyway though, and I get it out of the way first, giving the last one my all, even though I don't have any energy to give. "Mr Doctor Man, Questions his hands. Lost his mind. Clinically blind. Found a way to cope. Needle in his throat. Falling down while the weather spinning round and round he know!"

The crowd is screaming and I'm so happy to be up here despite my head ache. I do Bones Exposed next, then Your Gonna Go Far Kid, Drown, and Disenchanted. "I have a special treat for you tonight! I chant, at my last show I had my boyfriend come up and play drums with me, and my sister sing. But tonight for our last show, I thought I'd invite another friend of mine to come sing for me since he lives in San Diego." Everyone cheers "Please welcome Vic Fuentes!" The crowd goes even wilder and he runs out onto the stage

"Hi everyone you all having a good night?" The screaming gets louder and he says "Alright!"

"What song do you want to play first Vic?" I smile and he puts his arm around me

"How bout Hold On Till May, and you can sing Lindsey's parts huh?"

"Okay" I nod, and then get sets up his mic and sits on the stool next to me

"She sits up high" he sings as I strum beautifully, but his voice is even more beautiful "Surrounded by the sun. One million branches and she loves everyone" then song continues on and I feel nervous because I don't want to mess up, because he'll notice since it's his song, then I get to the alto and it gets even worse because he's never heard me sing in person

"If you were me you'd do the same" I sing, and he looks at me smiling "Cause I can't take anymore, I'll draw the shades and close the door! Everything's not alright, and I would rather" my eyes start watering as I keep strumming, and I'm smiling

"And as the sun went down, we ended up on the ground!" He sings, and when the sing concludes he says into the mic "Are you crying?"

"Shut up"  I laugh, wiping my face then shoving him, then he hugs me and I laugh, crying a bit

"Amanda is a really big fan of mine, because ya know, I'm amazing" he says and everyone's including me laughs "Andy introduces her to me as a surprise and-"

"I'm just really sad Tour is ending because all of you guys are so fucking amazing, and I'm just realizing how lucky I am to have had the opportunity to meet all these amazing people, and some of you guys too"

"I think we have time for another song or so" Vic nudges me and I giggle "You pick this time"

And so we play a sing for Isabelle, which is also another emotional song for me, but I hold it in. After we conclude with an oldie, falling asleep on a stranger. When we get off stage, I don't really talk to Vic, but then he says, "Hey are you okay?"

"Yeah I'm fine" I laugh a bit

"Wanna go outside and talk?" He asks

"No it's-"

"I don't care if you wanna talk or not, let's just go outside and hang alone for a bit" he says "That way I can maybe cheer you up a bit"

So we walk outside, and sit on the ground with vic's shoe holding the door open at a crack. "It's fucking freezing"

"Here" He starts taking off his jacket"

"No no no" I say am he laughs handing it to me "I'm not cold anymore, thanks"

"No, but it on"

"But then your gonna be-"

"I'm Mexican, Mexicans don't get cold" he says and I laugh, defeated, and sliding into the warm sweater "You played really good"

"Thanks" I sigh, I don't believe him

"You cried during hold on till May" he states

"It's just an emotional song for me" I laugh "My boyfriend tried to kill himself a few months back and that was the first song I played while on tour and because I was on tour I couldn't go see him"

"That's offal" He says "That must have been so hard waiting to go see him"

"Yeah" I exhale "Funny though, because he caused me about twenty attempts before yet I got so sad and scared when I cause him one"

"What do you mean you caused it?" He asks

"I was an asshole to him, he hurt me, but I got way to mad and made him feel so bad"

"Well how'd he cause you-"

"When we were younger he used me and led me on and then left, and pretended like it never happened but I loved him and he never cared about me" I laugh a bit "And going on with that too, my grandpa has just died of cancer, and I was already depressed as it was"

"Well how are you mentally now?" He asks

"I'm happy, and I'm happy to be on tour, here, with all these guys, but it also makes me depressed because I don't think I deserve it at all"

"Why?" He asks

"So many of your fans and there's have killed themselves and I used to be one of them, depressed and hopeless, then all the sudden I become famous and get to be happy but why should I get to when there's still people suffering" I sigh

"I feel that way sometimes" he nods "But you know what gets me through it?"

"What" a tears running down my cheek now

"Knowing how many lives I said rather then how many have been lost" he chuckles, and now a tears going down his face too "I wish I could help people more then I do and I wish people wouldn't take there own lives. It sucks and it's so sad. But there's always gonna be pain, and all we can do is help as many as we can" he hugs me, and I cry a little, holding onto him for dear life

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