To Learn To Fall (Sequel to the Other Side)

Chapter Three

It was hardly any different than usual during the time between dinner and when everyone decided it was time to drift away to bed. There was the same carelessness hanging in the air, the same sleepiness that accompanied the winding down of each day. I sat by myself as usual, pushed off to a secluded corner to watch the others. I've never minded it before, and I still hardly mind it now.

There's something to be said about solitary. 

My knees drawn to my chest, I watched Alexander happily. Serene night air blew in from the open window next to me, a gentle breeze that played with my hair. Outside, the crickets and the owls sang, and though I usually enjoyed their music on calm nights like tonight, they only bothered me as I tried to catch every word that Alexander spoke. I didn't want to miss a single one in fear I may never hear it again from his perfect voice.

He, Lafayette, and Hercules were all having a conversation about something that seemed to touch home for all of them. I wasn't exactly sure what it was about, but I think it had something to do with differences between Perriterra and their respective homes.

An impressive feat considering I'd hardly seen Lafayette and Hercules have a civil conversation since their breakup.

I really did enjoy watching Alexander talk. The way he puts all of his emotion and passion behind even the simplest of conversations was never something I was able to resist, even if he was arguing with me. And his eyes would always light up with that fiery excitement as he spoke, convincing and persuading and arguing or even just explaining.

Damn, do I fall hard.

I was vaguely aware of the presence that had appeared next to me as I sat alone, watching Alexander with a feeling I didn't understand myself, let alone describe. But as wonderful as it was, it was coupled with the dread and anxiety that exploded through my veins whenever I remembered that I was a ticking bomb with a limited amount of time to enjoy the things I enjoy and care for the people I care for 

"Uh oh."

I didn't bother looking up, recognizing that voice immediately. "What's wrong?"

James sat down next to me. "You've got that look in your eyes. What did you fuck up now?"

"Your confidence in me is overwhelming."

"Yeah, well, I do try."

The teasing jest was enough to get me to half smile and look over at him. "What do you want?"

"Something's wrong," he returned, his gaze following where mine had been.

I sighed and lowered my head, dread building in my body. "I did something horrible."

James didn't even hesitate before jumping to his first conclusion. "You murdered an innocent?!"

"What?" I frowned, looking back up at him. "N-no. Nothing that bad."

"Oh. Well, then what happened?"

I glanced around, searching to see if anybody was watching or within earshot to listen in, but everyone else was too occupied with themselves and hardly paying us any attention.

"I fell in love," I whispered. It became so much more real by saying it out loud. The confession was freeing and burdening at the same time. I had told someone, which was somewhat relieving, but now the shame and full realization of what I was dooming us to hit with all of its power.

He remained quiet for a moment before letting out a soft breathy sigh. "Thomas..."

"I know. I know."