To Learn To Fall (Sequel to the Other Side)

Chapter Six

I couldn't think.

Aaron was going on about something, but as much as I wanted to pay attention and listen to what I'm sure would have been a thrilling conversation, I just couldn't think.

It didn't help that I felt so cramped, sitting at that damn table surrounded by everyone else as Aaron continued on. I glanced up at the balcony outside and immediately regretted it when the restlessness spread to my wings and demanded that I get up and fly straight out of the door and into the waiting sky.

But here I was, stuck in this meeting.

Restless, sure. But it was also beginning to hurt quite a bit. The burning sensation was dragging through my body not unlike the way one drags a knife down their opponent's face, sharp and painful.

I bit down on my lip to force the whimper back.

My foot was tapping against the ground impatiently, my arms resting on the wooden table. I was too slumped over it when I was supposed to be sitting with a perfectly straight back and my chin held high.

What is wrong with you? I thought angrily, biting down hard on my teeth.

I didn't want to be here anymore.

Shut up, shut up, shut up. I'm not sure if my frustration was directed at Aaron or me or the raging war going on inside my mind and body, but one thing was for sure; I was craving absolute silence.

"It always seems like the King is one step ahead of us. Every attack we have planned, and he's there to counteract it. We may have to turn to complete and utter secrecy, more so than we are now. I suggest that we abandon the castle all together and find a new place to go," Aaron said, though it was really the only snippet I caught.

"And what good would that do?" Hercules combatted, leaning back in his chair.

"Well, it would allow us to..."

I forced my foot to lay flat against the floor, though the only thing that accomplished was suppressing my mounting frustration in a way that wasn't good or healthy in the slightest.

What were we talking about again?

Look at them all. You know how easily you could kill them? Then you'd never have to worry about sitting through another meeting like this~

I had to resist the urge to slam my head against the table.

What the fuck was wrong with me?

Alexander suddenly rested his hand on the table in such a sharp movement that couldn't be natural, catching my eye. I glanced up from the wooden table to look over at him, swallowing down every thought that swarmed through my head like angry hornets that wouldn't stop until they were avenged.

'You alright?' he mouthed. I felt his foot brush up against mine underneath the table, and I nodded easily and smiled.

I felt momentarily relieved for even just a second. Alexander cared about me, and he noticed when I was hurting. His comforting gaze locked on mine, and a small inkling of hope spiraled through my body.

But as wonderful as the feeling of being cared for was, it also made me feel somewhat worse. Like I was betraying him, hurting him, leading him astray.

How can I do this to him?

'Just bored,' I mouthed back, hoping he'd believe me or, at the very least, let it go. The last thing I needed was anyone else getting involved in something I could handle by myself.

He didn't look all too convinced, but his smile was a soft and reassuring one as turned to watch Aaron once more. I stared at the side of his face for a moment before returning to look at the table.