To Learn To Fall (Sequel to the Other Side)

Chapter Nine

I tried not to shift too much in discomfort in the clothes I was wearing, but I much preferred my normal coat opposed to this. Hercules took it as a sign of nerves.

"What's wrong? Are you nervous?" he chirped from my shoulder. I couldn't quite get used to the fact that he was now a bird.

"Yeah, a little bit." It was a complete understatement. "And you?"

Hercules didn't answer.

How I longed to sit down at my piano and watch my worries drain away as the music would fill the air, protecting me from them. But instead, I tried to occupy myself by listening to the bird chatter. Nothing too important, and my scouts weren't seeing anything out of the ordinary, but still the nerves remained right where they were.

"What do you think is going to happen?"

"I don't know. I'm really hoping they'll cancel it or something."

"Why would they?"

"Look, I'm hoping. I'm aware it's not realistic. "

Hercules looked away and stared at the forest on the side of the path I was walking down. His claws dug into the skin of my shoulder, but I was used to things like that by now.

The crunch of my feet against the gravel was unnerving in the fading light of the evening. I stared straight ahead, trying to keep my head high and stride long. Posture is important, I heard my mother saying, and smiled to myself.

"What are you going to do after this?" I asked suddenly.

"After the war, you mean?" Pause. "I don't know. I've never really thought about that before. I guess I'll go back to Rishfta. Why?"

"I don't know. I was just thinking of Avionerra. What would you do when you got back to Rishfta?"

Hercules made a noise that I've learned is similar to a laugh. "I really don't know. Maybe I'll stay here for a while. Periterra is nice, actually. I could start a life and a family here."

I had to force myself not to add the names of anyone in particular to this discussion.

"What about you? Where will you go?"

I had always put so much thought into my future before, but now I had to laugh at the irony of knowing that there was no future for me. It was bitter and stung like needles, but it was, in its own respect, kind of funny.

Still, I answered. "Anywhere but here."

"Really? Why?"

"I don't know. I don't like it here. I don't want to stay. I don't want to be a lord. I would never be a good leader."

"Well, where would you go?"

"Who knows? There's a whole multiverse out there. Thousands upon thousands of different and unique worlds waiting at our fingertips, and we don't know anything about them. Think about the advancements we could make, the magic we could find, the worlds we could see. It feels wrong knowing that there's so much out there and not journeying out to find it. I'd like to see as much as I can see and learn as much as I can learn."

"I never thought about it like that."

I listened to the birds for a while, trying to pick up anything that seemed out of the ordinary.

"What are you doing?" Hercules asked after a while.

"Hmm?"

"Wait. What did Alexander call it? Singing?"

Heat rushed to my face. "What are you talking about? I—"

"I heard you. No need to deny it. I'm not here to judge. How does it go?"