Dear diary: How do I heal his broken heart?; Choi Soobin

Diary's Page: 6

Dear diary... I couldn't stop.

I couldn't leave him alone, I couldn't ignore his pain. I know what he asked, I know what he wanted, but I saw him crashing down and I had to... Something inside me told me I had to be with him anyways.

Everything seemed to be fine, he was smiling, he was happy when we approved our project. But everything changed so fast... She told him she got bored of him, and I tried to ignore it, I swear I did... But before I knew it I was running back to try to find him.

He was locked in that empty room, throwing everything, breaking things, and crying.

I did what I had to do, I did what I wanted to do. I held him, I asked him to stop, and... He did. He did when I told him he didn't have to be alone.

The picture of him falling on his knees and starting to sob will be haunting me for a long time. God, why does it have to be this difficult?

I wanted to protect him, I wanted him to know I was there. I wanted him to accept me, and I knew he did when I hugged him and he cried in my arms, snuggling his face in the crook of my neck. I felt his pain instantly, and I wished it was me instead, so he wouldn't have to suffer.

I don't know what else should I say. He thanked me, he said I eased his pain... And that, somehow, made everything worth it.

There's something about him I don't know how to describe. There's something about him that's been taking control of me, I try to stay away but there's no use. He will come back to me every single time.

I'm afraid... My feelings, they're so strong. What is happening? What if they keep growing?

I don't know what love is, but... I'm not sure if I want to know.

What if he breaks my heart? Or what if I can't heal his own?

Dear diary... I feel vulnerable when we touch, when we share our pain, or even our laughs.

But at the same time, I want to share so much more.