Dear Evan Hansen Oneshots

Home-Sincerely Three

TRIGGER WARNING- Mentions of self harm and not eating

Jared was sitting in the bathroom, on top of the toilet lid. He was sitting in a bathroom he wasn't used to, his hand over his mouth, tears flowing down his face. He only wanted to go home.

Home.

Some people say that you can make any place home, but Jared found this very untrue.

Home was a place to be with the people you love.

Sure, Jared was with somebody he loved. But only platonically.

This made Jared upset.

Yes, they kissed every once in a while, and they were technically 'dating,' but Jared only said yes to Gabriel to be nice.

But Jared couldn't stand being so far away from the nice mediocre house he shared with Evan and Connor. He missed the evening cuddles. He missed waiting for Connor and Evan to come home from their jobs because of the difference in their shifts.

Jared missed Evan.

Jared missed Connor.

***

Around a month before:

"WELL I'M SORRY THAT I CAN'T BE GOOD ENOUGH."

"Jared, wait-" Evan tried.

"IF YOU REALLY THINK THAT, THEN LEAVE. PICK UP YOUR SHIT AND FUCKING LEAVE ALREADY," Connor screamed, crossing his arms as tears flooded his eyes. Jared shook his head, before spinning on his heels and walking outside.

Evan tried to stop him.

He shook the boy off, no matter how much it hurt him.

***

After that, Jared stayed with his aunt for a little while.

But then there was Gabriel. Gabriel took him in. Gabriel helped him when he needed somebody the most.

Gabriel loved Jared. And Jared was thankful.

But Jared didn't love Gabriel.

Jared stood up, looking at his reflection in the mirror. Puffy eyes. Rosy cheeks.

He couldn't do this anymore.

Nobody deserved this.

Jared walked out, playing with the bottom of his shirt. Gabriel was sitting on his bed, a sad smile on his face.

"Gabe, I-"

"I know. Listen, Jared. I just want you you to be happy. Whatever's going to stop you from being upset like this, go and do it. I just want you to know that we're splitting on good terms." Jared smiled.

"Definitely. Thank you. For everything."

"It was no problem."

Jared nodded at him.

And then, he left. He got into his car, and headed for home- or at least, what used to be home.

He didn't know what he was expecting. He didn't know if Evan and Connor were even still there. He didn't know if they were still together. He didn't know what they'd do when they saw him.

This brought a wave of anxiety over Jared. He gripped the wheel tighter, his knuckles almost white.

"Holy shit, what are you even doing?" Jared asked himself under his breath, shaking his head.

They wouldn't take him back. Why would they? It'd been a month since he'd left.

They'd most likely just have moved on to something new.

Just like people always did.

So, when Jared saw that Connor's jeep was in the driveway, the same bumper stickers as he always had, he was filled with a sense of relief.

It was still Connor.

Jared got out of his car. He knocked on the front door. Shortly after, it opened.

And for the first time in forever, Evan was standing in front of Jared. His eyes were dark, and the bags that sat under them were easily seen. His hair was messy. Tears glistened on his cheeks.

"Holy shit. Holy motherfucking shit, we thought, we thought you'd never-" Evan cut himself off, collapsing into Jared. Fresh tears spilled onto Jared's shirt, belonging to both of them. "I, I, I missed you so, so fucking much, Jared, you'd never- I-" Evan broke out into a fit of sobs. Jared held him tighter, looking up.

Connor was standing in the living room, his eyes wide. They looked slightly better than Evan's, but mostly similar. The same bags.

Jared slowly let go of Evan, looking at the floor as he walked up to Connor.

"C, I-" Connor brought Jared into a tight hug. Jared cried harder. "I love you guys so much," he mumbled, closing his eyes. Connor lifted his chin, bringing him into a kiss.

It felt so much more right than kissing Gabriel.

They parted, resting their foreheads against each other's. Connor took Jareds hand into his own.

"Does this mean-"

"Do you want it to?" Connor asked, looking into Jared's eyes. Jared smirked, nodding. "Evan?" Connor looked up at Evan, who nodded eagerly, running over and tackling them into a hug on the couch, laughing through his tears.

Something caught Jared's eye. He took Connor's arm. Connor watched with guilt as he gently rolled down his sleeve.

Scars lined his forearms, some new, some old. Some of the cuts were still kind of open. Evan saw this too.

"Connor, you said you weren't-" Evan stopped talking with a sigh. Jared traced the lines gently with his finger, his eyes widening.

"C, please try to stop. I know that it's hard. But I'm here, okay? And Evan's here. You can talk to us. We love you." Connor nodded.

"Have you been eating?"

"What?"

"Well, you asked me to stop cutting. Have you been eating?"

"But that's diff-" Connor crossed his arms, giving Jared the look. "Fine, I'll go make something." Jared smiled, standing up.

He was finally home.