Afraid of The Light

Chapter 5

Season: 7

Episode: Hello, Cruel World

***

Two days. Two days since I got my baby back. Two days since my angel baby flew me from harms way. Two days since Dean brought a sopping trench coat back to the car... without the owner.

Things have been better. That goes without saying, but right now... I need to put my selfishness aside for a moment. I have other things to focus on aside from my mental instability. I have an ill brother, a rapidly growing baby, and ancient other worldly threats to worry about.

"Twelve hours straight, I'm calling that rested." Dean says from the lounge room. I look over, standing in the kitchen with Celeste -who hasn't slept in two damn days- giving her a bottle.

"Speak for yourself." I mumble as I walk over, sitting on a chair by Sam's head.

"Mm. Breakfast in bed." He comments sarcastically when Dean gives him.

"Don't get used to it. Let me see that hand." Dean says, grabbing Sam's wounded hand from falling onto glass. To be honest, with everything going on, I can't remember when it happened. He pulls the bandage off, revealing A very nasty looking and poorly patched up wound.

"You'll live." Dean determines before getting up and grabbing alcohol to clean the wound. Sam pulls back and winces which results in Celeste pulling herself away from me and reaching for Sam.

"You want Uncle Sammy? Is momma not good enough for you?" I ask as I hand her over, not that she gives me much choice, the bitch is dead weight pulling herself to him. Sam chuckles slightly as he hugs her -albeit awkwardly- with his non-injured arm. Bobby walks up with a new gauze.

"So. Ooze invasion." Sam says, trying his best to focus on everyone else rather than the child in his lap. She makes it pretty easy to stay out of the way, hugging closely to Sam's chest but that's only beneficial to Bobby. Sam has to deal with her pulling at his long ass hair and tapping his face to try and get his attention. "Any leads?" Sam wasn't very impressed with all the love and affection C is giving him but he's trying to deal with it. For me and her. He knows I can't do this alone and he knows that she's gonna get her way whether we like it or not.

"I got all my feelers out." Bobby says, watching the interaction between Sam and his niece carefully. "Whatever they're up to, it ain't about going mothra on Main Street. They'll turn up." Bobby looks up at Sam for a moment before back down at the gauze. "You seem pretty eager to stretch your legs, you know."

"We all are, Bobby." I point out before grabbing Celeste as she yanks on Sam's hair again. "Hey, if you're wanting to hurt someone, hurt uncle Dean, okay? Not Sammy." She grins at me and I smile, kissing her head and looking up to see Dean's bitch face before he turns to focus on Sam.

"Now onto our other big problem. How're you doin'? And do not say okay."

"I'm not okay."

"You think?" He snaps rather harshly.

"Hey. Go a little easy." Bobby speaks up in a rather calm tone

"There's nothing easy about it, Bobby, okay. We acted like he had everything under control."

"I get it. I'm sorry. Look, I- I didn't exactly want to crack up, you know?"

"What the hell happened back there?" I ask as I bounce Celeste to keep her distracted. With the whole 'flying me away from danger' thing, I didn't get much of a chance to find out what happened.

"Well, it's not just flashbacks any more." Sam clarifies - sorta - for us.

"Well then what?"

"It's more like... I'm seeing through the cracks."

"As if you're still down there or...?"

"I'm having a difficult time figuring out what's real."

"So, hallucinating."

"For starters."

"Well for starters, if you're tripping Hell's Bells, why would you hide that?"

"I wasn't hiding it, Dean, I- I was just not talking about it. I mean it seemed like you two had enough going on as it was. Look, I- I just figured, try to hold onto the safety bar and ride it out, you know? But it's getting more specific." I raise an eyebrow at his words, at how his eyes could never land on one paticular thing.

"As in specifically what?" Dean snaps. I sit, staring into Sam for a sense of what it is.

"Lucifer."

"We're gonna need drinks." I say, standing up, temporarily offloading my daughter onto Bobby before grabbing the bottle of whiskey and three glasses.

-

"What the hell, Sam?" Dean snaps.

"I told you."

"I mean seriously, how do you, how do you argue with that?"

"I know. It's a problem." Sam is so exhausted, I can see it. Probably more exhausted than my 'I've been up for two days because angels babies don't need to sleep for more than a couple hours a month or whatever the hell' that I have been dealing with.

"Well now wait, I got it. Why would the Devil holodeck you a whole new life when he could just kick your ass all over the Cage?"

"'Cause, as he puts it..." Sam says, taking a deep breath. "You can't torture someone who has nothing left for you to take away."

"Okay, fine. But this Malibu dream mansion that he, he, he makes for you to take away is this post-apocalyptic mess?" I speak up as I offload an old T-Shirt for Celeste to play with. She's simply sitting at my feet without a care in the world, oblivious to the mess we're currently dealing with.

Sam looks to the side, not answering us but rather staring off. I focus on his eyes and realise they're set on a specific spot.

"Wait. Are you seeing him right now?" I ask to which he nods. I break away from my baby for a moment, walking over to the direction where he was looking.

"He over here somewhere?" He nods again. "How close am I? Am I warm?" Again, another nod. I swing a punch, and from Sam's flinching, I'm sure that I 'connected' the swing.

"Real or not real, Sam. Whether we're the real ones or him... I'll be here to kick his ass. Because nobody," I say shaking my hand to release the pent up energy. "Nobody... will do this to my brother and get away with it."